7 behaviors of people who age with gratitude instead of regret, according to psychology

Farley Ledgerwood by Farley Ledgerwood | April 23, 2025, 9:40 pm

Growing older can be a journey of self-discovery or a path littered with regret. It all depends on the approach you take.

Psychology has found that the key to aging gracefully lies in gratitude. This isn’t about being blindly optimistic, but rather recognizing and appreciating the simple joys life has to offer.

Those who age with gratitude tend to exhibit certain behaviors that set them apart. And guess what? You can cultivate these behaviors too.

Here’s a sneak peek into seven behaviors of people who age with gratitude instead of regret, as backed by psychology.

This isn’t just about growing old; it’s about doing so with a sense of fulfillment and contentment. So, buckle up and let’s dive into this enlightening journey together.

1) Embracing change

One of the hallmarks of people who age with gratitude is their ability to embrace change.

Growing older inevitably brings a myriad of changes, both physical and emotional. For some, these changes can be daunting and cause a sense of loss or fear.

However, those who age with gratitude instead of regret see these changes as natural and integral parts of the journey.

They understand that change is a constant part of life. Rather than resisting it, they lean into it, seeing each new chapter as an opportunity for growth and self-discovery.

This mirrors what Carl Jung, the famous Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst said: “We cannot change anything unless we accept it.”

Acceptance here isn’t about passivity; it’s about acknowledging realities and then determining how best to navigate them.

Embracing change isn’t always easy. But with practice and a shift in perspective, it can become a powerful tool in aging with gratitude and fulfillment.

2) Cultivating mindfulness

The second behavior that stands out in people who age with gratitude is their practice of mindfulness.

I’ve personally found that being present and engaged in the moment has brought a deeper sense of appreciation for my life.

I remember vividly a day when I was sitting in my backyard, sipping on my morning coffee.

The birds were chirping, the sun was shining, and everything felt peaceful. In that moment, I wasn’t worried about my to-do list or any pending tasks. I was simply soaking in the beauty of the moment.

Mindfulness, as Jon Kabat-Zinn, the creator of the Stress Reduction Clinic and the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School, says, is about “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.”

By embracing mindfulness, we allow ourselves to savor each moment as it comes, fostering a sense of gratitude for the simple joys of life as we age.

3) Acknowledging imperfections

How often do we berate ourselves for our perceived flaws and mistakes?

People who age with gratitude recognize that life isn’t about being perfect.

They understand that it’s their imperfections and mistakes that have shaped them and contributed to their growth.

They don’t shy away from their missteps or try to cover up their flaws. Instead, they acknowledge them, learn from them, and use these experiences to cultivate a more profound sense of gratitude for their journey.

To quote renowned psychologist Carl Rogers: “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

This acceptance doesn’t mean stagnation or refusal to improve. Rather, it’s about acknowledging our humanity, forgiving ourselves for our mistakes, and using them as stepping stones to become better versions of ourselves.

Aging with gratitude involves embracing our imperfections and seeing them as an integral part of our unique identity. It’s raw, honest, and liberating.

4) Maintaining a positive attitude

Positivity is a common trait shared by those who age with gratitude. They choose to focus on the silver linings, even in challenging situations.

A study conducted by psychologists at the University of California, Davis, and the University of Miami revealed that participants who wrote about things they were grateful for each week were more optimistic about their lives than those who wrote about neutral or negative experiences.

This isn’t about ignoring difficulties or pretending everything is rosy. It’s about acknowledging the full spectrum of life experiences while choosing to focus on the positive.

This conscious choice to cultivate a positive outlook can significantly impact how we age and our overall happiness levels.

Aging with gratitude, therefore, involves maintaining a positive attitude and appreciating life’s blessings, no matter how small they may seem.

5) Living authentically

One of the most liberating things about aging is the freedom to be true to oneself. People who age with gratitude often lead authentic lives, unapologetically embracing who they are.

I remember a conversation with my grandmother who, in her eighties, told me she felt more herself than ever before. She had shed societal expectations and was living in tune with her desires and values. That conversation left a lasting impression on me.

This aligns with the words of renowned psychologist Albert Bandura who said, “In order to succeed, people need a sense of self-efficacy, to struggle together with resilience to meet the inevitable obstacles and inequities of life.”

Living authentically means embracing our true selves, our strengths, our weaknesses, our passions. It’s about aligning our actions with our beliefs and values.

And in doing so, we cultivate a sense of gratitude for the unique individuals we’ve become through our journey of life.

6) Welcoming solitude

It might sound counterintuitive, but those who age with gratitude often value solitude. They see it not as loneliness, but as a cherished opportunity for self-reflection and personal growth.

As famed psychologist Carl Jung once said, “Solitude is for me a fount of healing which makes my life worth living.”

Embracing solitude allows us to pause, assess our lives, and cultivate self-awareness. It’s during these quiet moments that we can reflect on our experiences, our growth, and find a deep sense of gratitude for the journey thus far.

So, contrary to what society often suggests, aging with gratitude often involves welcoming solitude and using it as a tool for introspection and personal growth.

7) Cultivating resilience

Lastly, people who age with gratitude are often resilient. They understand that life is full of ups and downs, but they possess the strength to bounce back from adversities.

As the influential psychologist Albert Ellis said, “The art of love is largely the art of persistence.”

This resilience not only allows them to navigate life’s challenges but also fosters a deep sense of gratitude for their inner strength and the lessons learned along the way.

Final thoughts

Aging gracefully, filled with gratitude rather than regret, is not an elusive concept. It’s a choice we can make every day, regardless of our circumstances.

It’s about embracing change, cultivating mindfulness, acknowledging imperfections, maintaining a positive attitude, living authentically, welcoming solitude, and building resilience.

These behaviors aren’t overnight transformations. They’re cultivated over time, through conscious effort and introspection.

As we journey through life, let’s remember that aging is not just about growing old.

It’s about growing and evolving as individuals. It’s about appreciating the wisdom that comes with experience and cherishing the journey thus far.

So next time you find yourself reflecting on life and the passage of time, remember to mix in a healthy dose of gratitude.

You might just find that it becomes your secret to aging gracefully and contentedly.