Some people, no matter how hard they try, just can’t seem to grasp the unspoken language of social interactions. It might be awkward for them and for those around them, but there’s a psychological explanation behind it.

Now, imagine if you could spot these signs early on? It would make navigating social situations so much easier, wouldn’t it?

For that reason, I’ve rounded up seven behaviors that are tell-tale signs of someone who has difficulty reading social cues.

Remember, this isn’t about judging or labeling people. It’s about understanding each other better and fostering effective communication, which is key in any setting—be it in our day-to-day lives or even in the online world where miscommunication is a common pitfall.

So, let’s dive into these seven behaviors that psychology has pointed out.

1) Misinterpreting emotional cues

We’ve all seen it happen.

A conversation is flowing smoothly until someone says or does something that seems completely out of sync. It’s like they’ve missed the rhythm of the conversation, and suddenly, things become awkward.

This is often the case with individuals who struggle to read social cues. They might misinterpret an expression, miss the subtle tones in a voice, or overlook body language. As a result, they respond in a way that doesn’t match the emotional context of the situation.

This is a classic sign of social awkwardness, and it’s deeply rooted in psychology. As renowned psychologist Albert Mehrabian emphasized, “7% of any message is conveyed through words, 38% through certain vocal elements, and 55% through nonverbal elements (facial expressions, gestures, posture, etc).”

So if someone consistently misreads these nonverbal elements, it may indicate their difficulty with reading social cues. It’s not that they’re uncaring or oblivious – they simply process information differently.

The key to understanding and interacting with such individuals lies in recognizing these behaviors and responding empathetically.

2) Overanalyzing interactions

I vividly remember a friend of mine who had the habit of overthinking every social interaction. Let’s call him Mark.

Every conversation, every gesture, every look was dissected and analyzed in his mind. This often led to unnecessary worry and stress, as Mark would fret over whether he said something wrong or if someone was upset with him.

This tendency to overanalyze is another common behavior seen in people who struggle with reading social cues. Instead of naturally flowing with the conversation, they’re caught up in their heads, trying to decode every detail.

Carl Jung, the famous Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst once said, “We cannot change anything until we accept it. Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.”

This quote resonates deeply when dealing with this behavior. Accepting that social interactions are complex and not always easy to understand can liberate one from the need to dissect every single detail.

It’s about learning to let go and be present in the moment instead of overanalyzing.

3) Struggling with eye contact

Eye contact can be a tricky thing. Too little, and you may seem disinterested or aloof. Too much, and it can come off as intense or even creepy.

But for those who struggle with reading social cues, maintaining the right amount of eye contact is often a significant challenge.

It’s a raw, honest truth that many people grapple with. They might look away too quickly or stare for too long, unable to gauge the appropriate balance. It can make interactions uncomfortable and add to their feelings of awkwardness.

The ability to engage in eye contact is more than just a social etiquette; it’s a window into our emotions and intentions. For those who struggle with it, it’s not about being rude or unfriendly. It’s about navigating a complex social language that doesn’t come naturally to them.

4) Difficulty with small talk

We’ve all been there – stuck in a social setting where small talk is the order of the day. For most people, it’s manageable, even if it’s not particularly enjoyable. But for others, like my cousin Sarah, it’s a veritable minefield.

Sarah often tells me how she finds small talk incredibly challenging. Finding the right thing to say, understanding when to listen, knowing when to respond – it seems like a monumental task. She often ends up staying quiet, which others may interpret as disinterest or aloofness.

This struggle is common among those who have difficulty reading social cues. As psychologist Susan Cain beautifully puts it, “Don’t think of introversion as something that needs to be cured.”

It’s not about changing who you are but understanding your strengths and adapting your approach to social interactions.

Remember, not everyone thrives in the realm of small talk, and that’s perfectly okay. It’s about finding your comfort zone and learning to communicate effectively within it.

5) Excessive apologies

Ever met someone who says ‘sorry’ a little too often? Even when it’s not their fault or when an apology isn’t needed?

This is a classic behavior among those who struggle to read social cues.

It’s like they’re constantly on edge, ready to take the blame for any perceived discomfort or awkwardness in a conversation. They may feel that by apologizing, they can smooth over any potential misunderstandings or negative feelings.

As prominent psychologist Dr. Brené Brown advises, “True belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world.”

We don’t need to apologize for being ourselves or for misunderstanding social cues. It’s about embracing our imperfections and continuing to learn and grow from our experiences.

6) Over-dependence on rules and routines

A friend of mine, let’s call him Adam, is someone who thrives on routine.

He has a set way of doing things and becomes disoriented when his routine is disrupted. This dependence on rules and routines extends to his social interactions as well.

Adam struggles with reading social cues and often relies on established norms and rules to navigate social situations. He might stick strictly to formalities or be overly polite, out of fear of making a social blunder.

This dependence on rules is common among those who find it challenging to read social cues.

It’s not about disregarding rules or routines but about learning to trust our intuition and adapt to the fluid nature of social interactions.

7) Being overly formal

I remember my old school friend, Jenny, who was always extra formal during social interactions. She wouldn’t use slang, crack jokes or be spontaneous. It was as if she was following a script.

This formality is often a defense mechanism for those who have difficulty reading social cues. They stick to what’s ‘safe’ and avoid potential missteps.

Psychologist Erik Erikson once said, “Life doesn’t make any sense without interdependence. We need each other, and the sooner we learn that, the better for us all.”

It’s about understanding each other’s quirks and helping each other navigate the complexities of social interactions.

Wrapping up: It’s about understanding, not labeling

At the heart of it all, the behaviors we’ve discussed are not about labeling or categorizing people. They’re about understanding the diversity of human interactions and communication styles.

The field of psychology has long stressed the importance of empathy and understanding in human relationships.

As Carl Rogers, one of the most influential psychologists of the 20th century, once said, “When someone really hears you without passing judgment on you, without trying to take responsibility for you, without trying to mold you, it feels damn good.”

Remember that everyone is on their own unique journey of social understanding and growth. Some may need more time or guidance to read social cues effectively. And that’s okay.

The beauty of human interaction lies in its complexity and diversity. Let’s embrace it, understand it, and continue to learn from each other. After all, our differences are what make our shared experiences so enriching.