There’s a clear distinction between being a good person and simply pretending to be one.

This difference lies in consistency. Pretending requires an effort to maintain a facade, whereas being genuinely good comes naturally through habits.

As a psychologist, I’ve studied these habits extensively.

They aren’t grand gestures or dramatic acts of kindness. Instead, they’re small, daily actions that add up over time.

In this article, I’ll share the daily habits that genuinely good people tend to have, in my experience.

These are simple, achievable behaviors that can help you become a better person – not just in the eyes of others, but in your own eyes as well.

1) Mindful kindness

Genuine goodness isn’t an abstract concept.

It’s an active, intentional practice. And one of the ways this practice manifests is through mindful kindness.

Mindful kindness is the conscious act of being kind without any expectation of reciprocation.

It’s about being aware of your actions and their potential impact on others.

In my experience as a psychologist, I’ve noticed that genuinely good people have a gift for mindful kindness.

They don’t just perform kind acts when it’s convenient or when they stand to benefit from them.

They incorporate kindness into their daily lives, making it a habit.

They might leave a note of appreciation for a coworker, help a stranger with their groceries, or simply offer a listening ear to someone in need.

This daily habit of mindful kindness doesn’t just improve the lives of those around them; it also contributes to their own sense of well-being.

After all, kindness is a two-way street – the more you give, the more you receive.

So if you’re striving to become a genuinely good person, consider incorporating mindful kindness into your everyday life.

It may seem like a small step, but remember: big changes start with small steps.

2) Consistent honesty

Honesty is a cornerstone of genuine goodness.

It’s about being truthful, not just in big moments, but in everyday interactions.

As a psychologist, I’ve seen how consistency in honesty can build trust and strengthen relationships.

But this is also something I’ve experienced firsthand in my personal life.

I remember a situation with an old friend years ago. She had asked for my opinion on something deeply personal.

It was a moment where I could have told a little white lie to avoid hurting her feelings.

But I knew the importance of being truthful, even when it’s hard.

So, I shared my honest thoughts, gently and considerately. Initially, she was upset, but with time she acknowledged that it was what she needed to hear.

Our relationship deepened after that conversation because she knew she could trust me to be honest.

Being consistently honest doesn’t mean being blunt or hurtful. It’s about communicating truth with kindness and respect.

It’s a daily habit that can transform your relationships and contribute to your journey of becoming a genuinely good person.

3) Regular self-reflection

Self-reflection is a significant habit of genuinely good people.

It allows them to assess their actions, learn from their mistakes, and strive for continuous self-improvement.

Research suggests that people who engage in regular self-reflection are more likely to exhibit empathy and understanding towards others.

This is because self-reflection improves emotional intelligence, which plays a crucial role in our interactions with others.

Engaging in regular self-reflection doesn’t have to be a complicated process.

It could be as simple as taking a few minutes at the end of each day to contemplate your actions, feelings, and experiences.

4) Active listening

In a world full of distractions, genuinely good people have mastered the art of active listening.

This involves not only hearing the words that another person is saying but also understanding and empathizing with their feelings behind the words.

Active listening is more than just a communication skill; it’s a way of showing respect and understanding to others.

It sends a clear message: “I value what you have to say, and I’m here for you.”

This habit requires focus and intentionality, making it a true act of kindness.

It involves body language, like maintaining eye contact, and verbal cues, like paraphrasing or asking follow-up questions to show that you’re engaged.

By adopting the habit of active listening, you’ll not only improve your relationships but also strengthen your reputation as a genuinely good person.

5) Empathy in action

Empathy is a core trait of genuinely good people.

It’s the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, to step into their shoes and see the world from their perspective.

But for genuinely good people, empathy isn’t just a passive feeling; it’s a call to action.

When they sense someone is going through a tough time, they don’t just express sympathy; they do something about it.

Maybe it’s making a home-cooked meal for a friend going through a breakup, or offering to babysit for a neighbor who’s overwhelmed with work.

It could be as simple as sending an encouraging text to someone who needs it.

These acts of empathy can make a world of difference to someone who’s struggling.

They communicate, “I’m here for you, you’re not alone.”

6) Authenticity

Authenticity is the practice of being true to oneself, even when it’s uncomfortable or inconvenient.

It’s about embracing your flaws, owning your mistakes, and living according to your values.

I remember a time when I was offered a highly lucrative job that didn’t align with my principles.

It was tempting, but I knew deep down that accepting it would mean compromising my authenticity.

So, I turned it down. It was a difficult decision, but in the end, it felt liberating.

I realized that staying true to myself was more valuable than any job offer.

Authenticity contributes significantly to being a genuinely good person.

It fosters trust, promotes open communication, and builds strong relationships. 

7) Gratitude

Gratitude is a powerful habit that genuinely good people tend to practice daily.

It’s the act of recognizing and appreciating the positive aspects of life, big or small.

Gratitude can shift your focus from what’s going wrong to what’s going right.

It cultivates positivity and helps you to appreciate the joy in everyday moments.

Whether it’s acknowledging a kind gesture from a stranger, appreciating a beautiful sunset, or being thankful for good health, practising gratitude can significantly enhance your overall happiness and wellbeing.

8) Unconditional love

At the core of all these habits lies the most significant one: unconditional love.

It’s the ability to care deeply for others, regardless of their flaws or mistakes.

It’s about accepting others for who they are, without judgment or expectation.

Unconditional love involves not only loving others but also loving yourself.

It involves acknowledging your imperfections and celebrating your uniqueness.

This habit is the cornerstone of being a genuinely good person.

It creates an environment of acceptance and understanding, promoting peace and harmony in your relationships.

Practicing unconditional love every day can transform your life and the lives of those around you, making the world a better place one person at a time.

Final thoughts: It’s in the practice

The beauty of being a genuinely good person lies not in grand gestures or monumental achievements, but in the consistency of small, daily habits.

These habits, from mindful kindness and active listening to practicing gratitude and unconditional love, are what set genuinely good people apart.

They’re not just one-off actions; they’re a way of life.

Becoming a genuinely good person isn’t about overnight transformation.

It’s about making small changes every day and being patient with yourself throughout the journey.