When you have a person who thinks the world revolves around them, here is an orbital fact—you are going to get ridiculous dizzy.

I used to get this dizzy sensation all the time. And it was because of a childhood friend.

They were such a darn narcissist. For real, they left me in a perpetual state of emotional vertigo.

Often, they treated me as if I was just a background extra.

Whether sharing a work win or lamenting a perceived injustice against them, this person’s narratives were always expertly crafted to place them at the core of it all.

It took me years to locate my little escape hatch, and guess what?

That arrived in the form of my support network clocking onto how problematic this ego-driven person was to me.

I came out of that friendship with a renewed sense of self—a part of me I would never be in touch with had it not been for this narcissist and their enormous ego.

I want to use these smarts to help you. So, here are six tried-and-tested ways to show a narcissist you won’t play into their ego.

Let’s begin with a fun one, shall we?

1) Create a strong, vibrant life outside of them

Rather than feeding into a narcissist’s ego-fueled chaos, let’s dive deep into a better way to tackle it.

And this is a tip that will benefit you well outside the remit of this person: it’s building a vibrant, exciting, and fulfilling life beyond their reach.

That way, you don’t emotionally rely on them and their whims. Nope, not at all!

Your worth and your plans should not be based on someone else’s desires anyway, particularly if they are toxic and egotistical. 

How does one go about this, you ask? 

Well, it’s a fantastic time to engage in activities that bring you genuine joy.

Go to a cocktail mixology class. Try indoor roller skating at a rink. Volunteer with baby goats. Do whatever it is that fills your cup!

Plus it doesn’t stop there, this other life of yours must (this is a non-negotiable) involve you architecting a network of supportive people. And this is something I will explore in more detail later in the piece.

The aim here is to fall so hard in love with your life that the narcissist’s attempts to pull you into their self-centered world fall on deaf ears.

2) Use assertive, direct language when communicating

Instead of peppering to a narcissist’s massive ego, try my personal tactic: not showing weakness!

I know this sounds severe, but it makes total sense—stay with me here. 

It’s simple. You can do this in straightforward ways like being assertive, confident, and direct in your language with them.

This stance also extends to not showing them praise. Don’t tell them their cheekbones are sharp and angular when they are showing off their new bronzer.

Don’t tell them they are the most successful sibling when they refer to themselves as the black sheep of the family while secretly fishing for compliments.

Instead, keep steering the conversation back to reality and to your court (but not so much that you become the narcissist yourself, of course!).

This might help to usher in some much-needed self-awareness in their world.

It’s not squashing this particular person down, it’s about gracefully sidestepping the ego and forging your own path.

3) Don’t ever reveal too much about yourself emotionally or in terms of trauma

When it comes to the more self-obsessed folks in the world, it helps to keep your cards close to your chest.

How? Well, by not spilling your guts to them, for starters.

By this I mean, basically, don’t tell them your emotional life story. And believe me, they will try and get it even if you do not offer it up to them.

It pays to remember that whenever they ask for personal details, don’t lay it all out on the table for them.

You can either follow strategy a) share just the right amount of information so that it will keep you safe and enough that will keep them satiated.

Or you can do my personal fave, option b) redirection. This line of thinking means you switch the spotlight right back on them. 

Honestly, they will adore this move. Because why wouldn’t they absolutely eat up being the conversational focal point? That’s the story of their self-centered life.

PS: Don’t feel like you need to listen to what they are saying while they are in the spotlight. Smile and wave, boys. Smile and wave.

4) Steer clear of reacting emotionally to them

The thing about narcissists is that they are the vampires of the real world. Well, the emotional vampires.

They dine upon your innermost vulnerabilities, drinking it up like blood. (I am so sorry for that visceral image.)

Now, I have one clever, surefire way to approach this aspect of them: do not get emotional. 

By not reacting emotionally to all of their bait, you subvert their power and standing in the situation.

Instead, reply with a smile—as well as your secret weapon: indifference.

This way you keep composure (which you will undoubtedly need later), and shout loud and clear (without actually shouting, of course!) that they do not pull your strings and they cannot dictate your emotional state.

This welcomes in a subtle yet powerful shift in the dynamic—you will thank yourself for it later, trust me.

5) Surround yourself with a loving, caring support network

Now here is a good one I touched on earlier in the piece: build that tribe! This particular one is a definite game changer.

Facing a narcissist can be really tough, but the good thing is: you do not have to face them on your own.

This is why it is crucial to cultivate a team of caring and supportive people to help bail you out. 

These are the folks who always have your back and know precisely how to keep you on track emotionally.

Rather than getting into a head-to-head battle with your resident narcissist, you’re creating a shield of positive vibes.

It is a friendly reminder to you that your worth isn’t determined by their mad ego games.

6) Set out your personal boundaries—write a list if you have to

Dealing with a narcissist is a bit like building a big old fence. One that will keep the wolves from dining upon your chickens.

(The wolves being your narcissistic mate and the chickens being your emotional wellbeing, that is!).

By setting boundaries, you’re telling them that they can’t attack you.

So, go on, brainstorm those boundaries, bring them to life—heck, write them down in a journal if you have to.

Final thoughts

When it comes to ego-obsessed narcissists, build a strong support network, put up your boundaries, and keep those emotional reactions in check. 

Never underestimate the power of a support network. Friends, family, people who get you have your back, bolstering your confidence and keeping you safe from manipulation and emotional harm.

Next up, boundaries. When the narcissist tries to push your buttons, these boundaries help send a strong, unfaltering signal that you will not play their games.

Remember to keep a straight face and be sure to deny them the emotional reactions that they crave. 

By keeping cool, calm, and collected, you safeguard your power, leaving the narcissist fighting for control.