8 clever ways to put a mansplainer back in his place

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | December 6, 2024, 12:30 pm

When someone starts mansplaining, it can feel both frustrating and infuriating—especially when they try to diminish your expertise with their so-called ‘superior’ knowledge.

While recognizing this behavior is easy, knowing how to handle it with confidence and grace is a whole other challenge.

But don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.

I’m about to reveal 8 clever strategies to put a mansplainer in his place, without losing your cool.

So buckle up—things are about to get empowering and enlightening!

1) Engage with confidence

When a mansplainer strikes, it can feel like a sudden storm, sweeping away your sense of worth and knowledge.

But remember, you’re no pushover.

In fact, you’re armed with your own intelligence and experience.

When the mansplaining starts, don’t retreat. Engage confidently and assert your knowledge.

The trick here is not to be confrontational but to firmly stand your ground. Show them that you’re just as knowledgeable, if not more so.

It’s not about proving who’s smarter — it’s about asserting your right to be heard and respected.

And trust me, nothing throws a mansplainer off balance like a strong, confident response.

2) Use humor as a shield

Humor, in my experience, is an excellent tool to diffuse mansplaining situations.

Let me share a personal incident. I was once in a meeting discussing a project I’d been working on for months. A new team member, let’s call him Mike, decided to explain my own project to me, with everyone listening.

Instead of getting upset or defensive, I simply smiled and said, “Wow Mike, you’ve caught up so fast! I should probably start taking notes from you.” The room broke into laughter, and Mike got the hint.

By using humor, I was able to gracefully put him in his place without escalating the situation. It turned an uncomfortable moment into a lighthearted one and reinforced my authority on the subject.

A well-timed joke can go a long way!

3) Redirect the conversation

Communication is an art – a delicate dance of give and take. But when someone’s mansplaining, it becomes more of a monologue than a dialogue.

Here’s where redirecting the conversation can come in handy. It’s a subtle yet effective tactic used by diplomats and politicians to steer conversations in their desired direction.

Simply bring up a related topic that requires the mansplainer’s input, or ask a question that requires their specialized knowledge.

This gives them a chance to contribute constructively, shifting the focus away from their monologue and back to a balanced exchange of ideas.

By doing this, you’re not just putting the mansplainer in his place, you’re also fostering a healthier, more engaging conversation.

4) Validate then pivot

A mansplainer often believes they’re offering valuable insights, even when they’re just repeating what you already know.

In such cases, it can be effective to validate their input and then pivot the conversation. Start by acknowledging their point, and then add your own insight or steer the conversation towards a new topic.

For instance, you could say, “That’s a good point, John. It reminds me of another aspect of this issue that we haven’t discussed yet…”

By doing this, you’re subtly showing them that you are not a passive recipient of their unsolicited advice but an active and equal participant in the conversation.

You’re not just absorbing information — you’re contributing to it too!

And that’s how you maintain control of the conversation without losing your cool.

5) Set clear boundaries

Sometimes, the most direct approach is the best approach. That’s something I’ve learned over time.

You see, I’ve often found myself in situations where a polite hint or subtle redirection just doesn’t do the trick. In such cases, it’s important to set clear boundaries.

I usually do this by calmly stating, “I appreciate your input, but I’m already familiar with this topic.” It’s simple but effective, asserting my expertise without escalating the situation.

This direct approach may seem daunting at first, but it’s crucial for maintaining a healthy dialogue and mutual respect. After all, your knowledge and experiences are just as valid and deserve to be heard.

6) Show gratitude

This may sound surprising, but expressing gratitude can actually be an effective strategy.

When a mansplainer is in full swing, thank them for their perspective. This can catch them off guard, create a pause in the conversation and give you the opportunity to regain control.

You could say something like, “Thanks for your input, it’s always interesting to hear different perspectives.”

By doing this, you’re acknowledging their contribution without agreeing with it. You’re also subtly reminding them that there are indeed other perspectives out there – including yours.

It’s a move that gracefully puts the mansplainer in his place while maintaining the balance of the conversation.

7) Stand your ground

Mansplaining can feel like a mental tug-of-war, where the mansplainer tries to pull the conversation towards their viewpoint.

In such situations, it’s important to stand your ground. Be assertive, but not aggressive. Express your points clearly and confidently, reinforcing your own understanding and experience.

You could say, “I see where you’re coming from, but from my experience, I have found that…”

By standing your ground, you’re not just defending your viewpoint, but also establishing yourself as an equal participant in the conversation. It reinforces the fact that your thoughts and opinions are just as valid and valuable.

8) Remember your worth

At the end of the day, the most important thing to remember is your worth.

Mansplaining can be belittling and frustrating, but it should never shake your confidence or cause you to doubt your abilities.

You’re knowledgeable. You’re capable. You’re deserving of respect.

Don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.

Final thoughts

In any conversation, respect is key to healthy dialogue.

Facing a mansplainer can be tough, but with these strategies, you can confidently assert your worth and guide the conversation back to balance.

Your knowledge and experiences are valuable—you’re an equal contributor.

So next time, stand tall, assert your voice, and claim your right to be heard.

It’s not just about silencing a mansplainer—it’s about creating a culture where everyone’s insights are respected.

That’s a world worth striving for.