11 behaviors you should never tolerate from a colleague (no matter how nice they are)

Mia Zhang by Mia Zhang | May 30, 2024, 9:47 am

Do you have that one workmate who’s all smiles and kindness, but something about them just rubs you the wrong way?

Could be they’re always pushing their tasks on you, or making you look less than great in meetings.

Sound familiar? You’re not alone.

The truth is, most of us have had to deal with tricky colleagues at some point. And sometimes, even the seemingly nice ones can upset the apple cart at work.

In this article, we’re going to tackle 11 things you shouldn’t have to put up with from a colleague – no matter how friendly they come across.

Why? Because we all deserve a positive and peaceful workplace.

1) Last-minute task dumping

You know the drill. It’s Friday afternoon, you’re wrapping up your work and looking forward to a relaxing weekend. Suddenly, your colleague pops in and hands over a pile of tasks they’ve been sitting on all week.

Their excuse? They’re too busy or it’s not their job. Don’t let their pleasant demeanor fool you – this behavior is not okay. You have your own responsibilities and it’s unfair to burden you with extra work at the last minute, especially without any prior discussion or agreement. 

2) Constant negativity

In the hustle and bustle of the workplace, we all encounter rough patches. However, when a colleague consistently casts a shadow over the team’s morale with perpetual complaints or a pessimistic demeanor, it can swiftly drain the room’s energy. While they might exude kindness outside of work, enduring their constant grumbling shouldn’t be part of your job description.

Let’s be clear: safeguarding your own positivity and mental well-being is paramount. Take proactive steps to distance yourself from this negativity, and if it persists, it’s time for a candid conversation. Address how their attitude not only impacts you but also influences the collective team dynamic. 

3) Overstepping personal boundaries

We all like a good chit-chat with colleagues, right? But some people just don’t know where to draw the line.

I remember a colleague of mine from a few years back. We’ll call him Tom. Tom was a friendly guy, always ready with a joke or a story. But Tom had a habit of asking personal questions that made me uncomfortable. He’d ask about my weekend plans, my dating life, even my family. At first, I shrugged it off, thinking he was just being friendly. But eventually, it started to feel invasive.

You see, even if someone is nice, they don’t have the right to intrude on your personal life more than you’re comfortable with. It’s essential to establish clear boundaries between personal and professional life. If someone crosses those boundaries, it’s okay to let them know – just like I had to do with Tom.

4) Taking credit for your work

This one can be a real doozy. You work hard on a project, pouring in your time, creativity, and sweat. But when it’s time for recognition, your colleague steps in and takes all the credit. It’s not just unfair, it’s downright unethical.

Here’s an interesting fact: According to a survey by the Workplace Bullying Institute, credit-stealing ranks among the top types of bullying that employees endure at their workplace. If you find yourself in this situation, don’t stay silent. Speak up and make sure your contributions are recognized.

5) Gossip and rumor-spreading

This one hits close to the heart, doesn’t it? No one likes to be the subject of office gossip or rumors, especially when they’re unfounded or malicious. When a colleague engages in this kind of behavior, it can be deeply hurtful and damaging, not just to your professional reputation but to your emotional well-being too.

No matter how friendly or charming they may be, it’s critical not to tolerate this behavior. Stand up against it: if you hear something that doesn’t sound right, question it. Encourage open and honest communication in the workplace. After all, we’re all human beings deserving of respect and kindness.

6) Micro-managing everything

I’ve been there – working with a colleague who wants to oversee every little thing you do. Let’s call her Jane. Jane was nice and friendly, but she had a habit of micro-managing. She’d be over my shoulder, checking my work, giving unsolicited advice, and often correcting things that didn’t need correcting.

It can be incredibly frustrating and demoralizing to work with a micro-manager. It feels like they don’t trust your capabilities or judgement. If you’re stuck with a ‘Jane’ in your life, it’s important to address this behavior. Have a conversation about trust and autonomy at work. Remember, everyone deserves to feel valued and trusted in their role.

7) Never taking responsibility

Okay, let’s get real here. We all mess up sometimes, it’s part of being human. But have you ever worked with someone who NEVER owns up to their mistakes? They’re always pointing fingers, blaming others, or even worse, blaming you.

Despite their friendly façade, this behavior is as toxic as it gets. It creates a hostile work environment where no one feels safe or supported. If you’re dealing with a colleague like this, it’s time to put your foot down. Speak up and call out their behavior when you see it – because everyone should be accountable for their actions at work.

8) Invasion of privacy

In today’s digital world, privacy is more important than ever before. But what if your colleague doesn’t respect that? They snoop around on your computer screen, check your phone notifications, or pry into personal matters that you’d rather keep to yourself.

If you’re dealing with an overly curious colleague, it’s crucial to set boundaries and let them know that their behavior is not acceptable. After all, everyone deserves their personal space and privacy.

9) Undermining your work

Picture this: you’ve just finished a presentation that you’ve been working on for weeks. You’re feeling proud and accomplished. But then, your colleague steps in and starts criticizing or dismissing your work, often in front of others. It’s a punch in the gut, isn’t it?

I’ve been there too. I had a colleague who seemed to make it her mission to undermine my work at every opportunity. Despite her friendly demeanor, her constant belittling made me doubt my abilities and impacted my self-esteem.

Nobody should have to tolerate this kind of behavior. If a colleague is undermining you, it’s important to speak up. You deserve respect and acknowledgement for your hard work!

10) Disrespecting your time

Let’s talk straight here. Time is precious, right? But there’s always that one colleague who doesn’t seem to value it. They’re always late for meetings, they miss deadlines, or they keep you waiting. It’s frustrating and it shows a lack of respect for your time.

No matter how friendly they are, if a colleague continuously disrespects your time, it’s time for a serious chat. Your time is just as valuable as theirs, and it’s important to set this boundary firmly.

11) Spreading negativity

Alright, let’s get real here for a final time. Negativity is contagious. And when a colleague, no matter how nice, is constantly spreading negativity, it can poison the whole workplace. They’re always moaning about the boss, the workload, the office coffee – you name it.

Working with a constant complainer can be exhausting and demoralizing. So don’t put up with it. Encourage positivity, call out unnecessary negativity, and if all else fails, distance yourself. 

Zero tolerance, maximum respect: Building a better workplace together!

In conclusion, fostering a healthy work environment often requires setting clear boundaries and holding colleagues accountable for their actions. 

While it may be tempting to overlook certain behaviors, regardless of how friendly or well-intentioned a colleague may seem, it’s crucial to recognize that tolerating unacceptable conduct can erode morale, productivity, and ultimately, the overall culture of the workplace. 

In identifying and addressing these 11 behaviors head-on, you not only uphold professional standards but also promote a sense of respect, fairness, and mutual understanding among team members. 

Remember, constructive communication and consistent enforcement of expectations are key in cultivating a workplace where everyone feels valued and supported.