We all have that little voice in our heads. You know, the one that whispers you’re not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough. That’s your inner critic.

And while a little self-doubt can be beneficial, too much can be paralyzing.

Psychology has a lot to say about this inner critic and when it becomes too controlling. And let’s face it, we could all use a little insight into why we sometimes hold ourselves back.

So here we are, diving into the world of psychology to understand the 7 signs your inner critic has too much control over your life. This isn’t about silencing that voice completely.

Instead, it’s about learning to manage it effectively so it doesn’t hinder your progress in life (or in your writing process, for my fellow writers out there).

Because after all, words matter — whether they’re the ones you write down or the ones you tell yourself. Let’s get started!

1) You’re constantly second-guessing yourself

Self-doubt is a common part of life. We all experience it from time to time, and in moderate amounts, it can actually be beneficial. It encourages us to question our actions and strive for improvement.

But when self-doubt becomes a constant companion, it’s a sign that your inner critic might be holding too much sway over your thoughts.

Imagine that you’re drafting an email or crafting a presentation. You write a sentence, then delete it. Write another, then delete that too. You’re caught in this cycle of doubt and indecision, unable to make progress because your inner critic keeps finding fault with every word you write.

Sound familiar? This could be a sign that your inner critic is in overdrive. It’s like having a harsh editor in your head that can’t be satisfied, constantly nitpicking at your work, your words, your choices.

Accepting and understanding your inner critic is the first step towards regaining control of your thoughts and actions. Remember, questioning yourself is healthy but living in constant doubt? Not so much.

2) Perfectionism is paralyzing you

We’ve all heard the saying, “Nobody’s perfect.” Yet, many of us strive for perfection anyway. I’ve been there too, caught up in the pursuit of an unattainable ideal.

Let me share an example. A few years ago, I was working on a big writing project. I spent countless hours researching, writing, editing, and rewriting. No matter how many times I revised it, it never seemed “perfect” enough to me.

The result? I missed the deadline and ended up not submitting it at all. My inner critic had convinced me that it was better to do nothing than to risk presenting something less than perfect.

That’s when I realized how much control my inner critic had over me. It wasn’t just guiding me; it was paralyzing me with fear of imperfection.

So, if you find yourself paralyzed by your quest for perfection – afraid to take action because you might make a mistake – take this as a sign that your inner critic might be controlling too much of your life.

It’s time to say no to perfectionism and yes to progress, however imperfect it may be.

3) You’re constantly comparing yourself to others

Do you find yourself constantly measuring your success against others’?

Whether it’s scrolling through social media, looking at everyone’s highlight reels, or feeling inadequate in comparison to your seemingly successful peers, comparison can be a deadly trap.

I’ll be brutally honest here. I’ve spent countless nights feeling bad about myself because I wasn’t as successful, as popular, or as accomplished as my peers. My inner critic would chime in, reminding me of all the ways I fell short.

It was a toxic cycle that left me feeling drained and unhappy.

Redirecting that energy spent on comparing myself to others into personal growth and self-improvement has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.

So, if you find yourself stuck in the comparison trap, it’s a clear sign that your inner critic is having too much control. It’s time to break free and start focusing on your own journey instead. 

4) You struggle with making decisions

Making decisions can be tough. Should you take that job offer? Should you move to a new city? Even choosing what to eat for dinner can sometimes feel like a monumental task.

And when your inner critic is in the driver’s seat, decision-making can become even more challenging. Every option seems fraught with potential mistakes and failures, and you become paralyzed by the fear of making the wrong choice.

I’ve had moments where I’ve spent hours agonizing over a simple decision. My inner critic would create worst-case scenarios, convincing me that one wrong move would lead to disaster. It was mentally exhausting.

A study published in the journal Psychological Science found that when people were made to feel more powerful, they made decisions more quickly and stuck with them.

The reason? They were less likely to second-guess themselves. Conversely, those who felt powerless took more time and were more likely to change their minds, indicating a higher level of self-doubt and inner criticism.

5) You’re overly critical of others

Have you ever noticed how those who are overly critical of others are often just as hard, if not harder, on themselves? It’s a tough realization I had to come to terms with.

In my quest for perfection, I found myself not just critiquing my own work but also the work of others. It was as if my inner critic had spilled over from my own mind and started evaluating everyone else around me.

The truth is, our assessments of others often mirror our assessments of ourselves. 

When we’re highly critical of others, it’s often a reflection of our own insecurities and self-criticism. And while it’s important to give constructive feedback, there’s a difference between helping others improve and being overly critical.

If you find yourself being overly critical of others, it could be a sign that your inner critic is controlling your perspective. Consider it a wake-up call to address your own self-criticism and cultivate more compassion — for both yourself and others.

6) You’re always busy, but never feel productive

Here’s a paradox for you: the harder you work, the less you feel you’ve accomplished. Sounds counterintuitive, right? Yet, it’s a reality for many of us who have an overactive inner critic.

You’re always busy, always working. Yet, at the end of the day, you feel unproductive. Your inner critic convinces you that despite all your efforts, you haven’t done enough. It’s a relentless cycle that leaves you constantly chasing productivity but never feeling satisfied.

This state of constant busyness without real productivity is a clear sign your inner critic is in control. It’s pushing you to do more and more while never allowing you to feel good about what you’ve accomplished.

The key is to focus on the process, not just the outcome.

So if you’re always on the go but never feel like you’ve achieved anything, it’s time to reassess. Take some time to celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem. Yes, progress is progress, regardless of how big or small.

7) You can’t accept compliments

Ever find it difficult to accept compliments? Instead of saying a simple “thank you,” you downplay your achievements or brush off the praise. This struggle to accept compliments is often a sign of an overactive inner critic.

Famous psychologist Nathaniel Branden once said, “The first step toward change is awareness.” Recognizing this tendency to dismiss praise is the first step towards taming your inner critic.

So the next time someone compliments you, resist the urge to downplay or deflect. Accept it graciously. Remember, you are deserving of praise and recognition. Don’t let your inner critic tell you otherwise.

Final reflections

Navigating the labyrinth of our minds can often feel like a formidable task. The inner critic, with its powerful voice, can sometimes drown out our self-compassion and confidence.

But remember, just because your inner critic is loud doesn’t mean it’s correct. Recognizing its influence and understanding its signs is the first step towards regaining control.

We’ve explored the signs of an overzealous inner critic according to psychology, but it’s crucial to remember that everyone’s experiences will be different. What’s essential is that you listen, learn, and adapt.

Whether it’s stepping back from perfectionism, learning to accept compliments or understanding that constant busyness doesn’t equate to productivity – it’s all a journey.

Because at the end of the day, you are more than what your inner critic tells you. You are capable, you are worthy, and above all else, you are enough.