8 signs someone is trying to distance themselves from you, without having to admit it

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | July 30, 2025, 4:24 pm

Navigating relationships can be a tricky business. Sometimes, it’s hard to tell if someone is genuinely busy or if they’re subtly trying to create some distance.

It’s not always easy to read between the lines and detect those subtle signs that someone is attempting to put a little space between you and them, without actually stating it outright.

In this piece, we’re going to explore eight telltale signs that someone is trying to distance themselves from you, without having to admit it.

Not everyone is comfortable with confrontation or expressing their feelings directly, so it’s essential to be attuned to these non-verbal cues. Let’s break down these signs and help you understand the nuances of your relationships in a clearer light.

1) They’re suddenly too busy

Everyone gets busy, it’s a part of life. But if someone who once had time for you is now consistently unavailable, it might be a sign they’re creating distance.

People often use ‘busy’ as a socially acceptable way of distancing themselves without having to explicitly admit it. It’s a less confrontational method that avoids hurting feelings or causing conflict.

But let’s be real – everyone is busy, but we all make time for the people and the things that matter to us. So if they’re always too busy for you, it might be more than just a packed schedule.

Remember to consider this in context though. If their workload or personal circumstances have genuinely increased, they might actually be telling the truth. It’s when the ‘busy’ excuse becomes a pattern without a valid reason, that it becomes a cause for concern.

Looking out for this sign can help you understand their intentions and figure out where you stand in their life. 

2) They’re less responsive

In the age of technology, it’s nearly impossible to not be reachable. So, when someone who used to be quick in responding suddenly takes hours or even days to reply, it could be a sign.

I experienced this with a friend of mine. We used to chat daily, sharing jokes, exchanging stories, and discussing anything under the sun.

Then suddenly, her responses started to slow down. What used to be an instant reply turned into hours, then days. At first, I thought she was just busy. But even on weekends or holidays, the pattern continued.

Her responses also became shorter and less engaging. Our once lively conversations became reduced to simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers. It felt like she was no longer interested in maintaining our connection.

It was a tough pill to swallow, but the change in her communication style was a clear sign that she was trying to distance herself from me. It allowed me to reassess our relationship and adjust my expectations accordingly.

Yes – communication is the backbone of any relationship. If it starts changing drastically without a reasonable explanation, it might be time to evaluate where you stand.

3) They avoid shared activities

You both used to love that Tuesday night trivia at the local pub or that weekend hike. But now, they always seem to have an excuse to not join. This could be a sign they’re trying to create distance.

In a study conducted by Social Psychological and Personality Science, researchers found that people who are trying to disconnect will often avoid shared activities. It’s a subtle way of reducing the closeness without having to directly address the issue.

Shared activities are more than just fun. They’re moments of bonding and connection. So, when someone starts avoiding these, it’s often an attempt to reduce the intimacy and connection in the relationship.

Take note if they’re consistently missing out on shared activities. It might be their way of telling you they need some space.

4) They’re less open with you

Sharing personal thoughts, feelings and experiences is a significant part of any relationship. It creates a bond and a sense of trust. So, when someone starts being less open and more reserved, it might be a sign they’re distancing themselves.

They might start giving vague answers or avoiding personal topics altogether. Conversations might become more superficial, sticking to safe topics like the weather or current events.

This change in communication can often feel confusing and frustrating. But it’s important to remember that it’s not necessarily about you. They may be going through their own struggles or simply need some time to process their thoughts.

Understanding this sign can help you navigate your relationship and respond empathetically. It’s all about keeping the communication lines open and being patient with their process.

5) They’re less affectionate

A hug. A warm smile. A gentle pat on the back. These are simple gestures, yet they hold so much meaning. They’re expressions of affection that reassure us of our connection with others.

When these gestures start to fade or disappear completely, it can feel like a punch in the gut. It’s as if a crucial part of your relationship is slowly slipping away. This lack of affection could be a sign that they’re trying to distance themselves from you.

Affection is a silent language that communicates love, care, and closeness. When it lessens, it can create a sense of disconnection and loneliness.

It’s essential not to ignore this subtle change. Recognizing it can help you understand their feelings better and decide how to address the situation. It’s okay to feel hurt, but remember it’s also crucial to respect their space and feelings.

6) They don’t engage in future plans

Planning for the future is a sign of commitment, whether it’s in friendships or romantic relationships. When someone starts avoiding making future plans with you, it might be their way of subtly creating distance.

I recall a time when a close friend of mine started declining invitations to future events. It was a simple yearly tradition – a group trip to a music festival. But when I brought up the subject, she immediately brushed it off, saying she wasn’t sure about her schedule months ahead.

At first, I didn’t think much of it. But as time went on, I noticed she was avoiding all sorts of future commitments – from weekend getaways to even simple dinner plans a few weeks ahead.

It took me some time to realize that this was her way of distancing herself, without having to explicitly say it. It was a hard realization, but understanding this helped me to accept the changes in our relationship.

7) They stop sharing good news with you

Sharing joy and achievements is a natural part of any relationship. It’s a way for us to connect and celebrate together. But if they stop sharing their good news with you, it could be a sign they’re pulling away.

When someone distances themselves, they often limit the information they share. This includes their successes and happy moments. You might find out about their good news through others or even social media, instead of directly from them.

This change can be confusing and hurtful. But remember, it’s not a reflection of your worth or importance. It’s just their way of creating some distance without having to openly admit it.

Recognizing this sign can help you navigate your relationship with understanding and empathy. Remember, it’s all about respecting their space while also taking care of your own feelings.

8) They become indifferent

The opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. When someone starts showing a lack of interest or concern towards you, it’s often the clearest sign they’re distancing themselves.

Indifference can come in many forms. They might stop asking about your day, show less enthusiasm when you talk, or even seem uninterested in your feelings. This lack of emotional engagement can feel disheartening.

Remember, everyone has off days. But consistent indifference is a strong indication that they’re trying to create distance. It’s crucial to recognize this sign and address it appropriately.

It may not be an easy conversation, but it’s a necessary one for the health and understanding of your relationship.

Final thoughts: It’s all about understanding

At the heart of it all, relationships are complex and ever-changing. They’re a dance of emotions, intentions, and actions. Sometimes, the dance is smooth and harmonious; other times, it’s disjointed and confusing.

When someone tries to distance themselves without admitting it outright, it can feel hurtful and puzzling. But remember, it’s not always about you. Each person has their own journey, and sometimes, they may need some space to navigate through it.

As American author Wayne Dyer aptly said, “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.” This holds true for everyone. Sometimes, people need to distance themselves to reconnect with their inner selves.

Recognizing these signs doesn’t mean the end of a relationship. Instead, it’s a chance for reflection and understanding. It’s an opportunity to reassess your connection and find ways to nurture it moving forward.

As you reflect on these signs, remember that understanding is the key. It’s about respecting their space while also taking care of your own feelings.