8 assertive phrases that instantly make people respect you more, according to psychology

If you’ve ever struggled to get your point across or command respect, you’re not alone. Sometimes, it’s not about what you say, but how you say it.
Assertiveness, backed by psychology, can be your game changer. It involves expressing yourself effectively and standing up for your point of view while also respecting the rights and beliefs of others.
Using assertive phrases can boost your self-esteem and earn you respect in conversations. It’s not a personality trait, but a communication skill that anyone can learn.
In this article, we’re going to dig into 8 assertive phrases that instantly make people respect you more. This could be your first step towards mastering the art of assertive communication.
1) “I understand where you’re coming from, but…”
This phrase is a powerful way of asserting your perspective while also acknowledging the other person’s viewpoint.
It’s an approach that highlights your ability to listen and empathize, and it’s grounded in mutual respect.
Let’s say someone proposes an idea that you don’t entirely agree with.
Instead of outright rejecting it, you might start by saying, “I understand where you’re coming from, but…” and then present your perspective.
This demonstrates that you’ve considered their viewpoint but have your own thoughts on the matter.
Using this phrase can potentially prevent defensive reactions and open up a more constructive dialogue. It’s not about winning or losing an argument; it’s about fostering understanding and respect.
By showing that you value the other person’s input, even if you don’t fully agree, you’re setting up a positive dynamic for further discussion.
2) “I need some time to think about this…”
Now, you might think that this phrase could indicate indecisiveness or lack of confidence. In reality, it’s quite the opposite.
When you say, “I need some time to think about this…”, it shows that you value deep consideration and thoughtful decision making.
In a fast-paced world where quick decisions are often praised, taking a moment to pause and reflect can be seen as a sign of strength.
It shows that you’re not easily swayed and that you’re committed to making the best decision possible, even if it takes a little time.
This phrase is particularly effective in situations where you’re being pressured to make an immediate decision.
By asserting your need for time, you not only demonstrate respect for your own thought process but also command respect from others.
In psychology, this approach aligns with the concept of mindful decision-making, which involves pausing to consider all aspects of a situation before responding.
It’s a powerful way to demonstrate assertiveness in a respectful and effective manner.
3) “I have a different perspective…”
Expressing your viewpoint as “I have a different perspective…” rather than “You’re wrong” or “That’s not right” can change the whole tone of a conversation.
This phrase is respectful and assertive, as it shows that you’re open to hearing other viewpoints while confidently expressing your own.
It’s essential to remember that people perceive the world differently based on their experiences, beliefs, and values.
When you acknowledge this fact and express your perspective as just that – a perspective, not an absolute truth – you create space for open, respectful dialogue.
Interestingly, research shows that when individuals feel heard and respected, they are more likely to reciprocate the same respect.
This phrase does exactly that – it shows respect for others’ viewpoints while asserting your own, leading to increased respect towards you.
4) “Let’s find a solution that works for both of us…”
When disagreements arise, this phrase can help steer the conversation towards a more constructive path. Instead of focusing on who’s right or wrong, it centers on finding a mutually beneficial solution.
This phrase shows that you’re not just thinking about your own wants and needs. You also care about the other person’s feelings and concerns.
It encourages cooperation and collaboration, rather than competition and conflict.
By shifting the focus to finding common ground, you’re showing your willingness to compromise and work together. This approach can:
- Build trust
- Strengthen relationships
- Garner more respect from those around you.
It’s an assertive way to resolve disagreements while maintaining a positive, empathetic tone.
5) “I appreciate your input, however…”
We’ve all been in situations where someone gives unsolicited advice or makes a suggestion that we don’t necessarily agree with.
Instead of dismissing it outright, the phrase “I appreciate your input, however…” can help you express your disagreement in a respectful and assertive way.
Starting with an acknowledgment of their contribution shows that you respect their viewpoint. Following it with a “however” signals that you have your own thoughts and beliefs on the matter.
This phrase is a gentle yet assertive way to maintain your stance while also showing respect for others’ opinions. It creates a balance between standing up for yourself and maintaining harmony in your relationships.
In essence, it’s about being true to yourself while also valuing the perspectives and feelings of others – a relatable challenge we all face in our daily interactions.
6) “I feel uncomfortable when…”
This phrase is a straightforward and assertive way to express your feelings, especially in situations that cause discomfort.
By starting with “I feel…”, you are owning your emotions and not placing blame on others.
For instance, let’s consider a situation where a friend consistently shows up late.
Instead of saying, “You are always late!” which can lead to defensiveness, you could say, “I feel uncomfortable when I have to wait for a long time. Could we try to meet at the agreed time?”
By expressing your discomfort and suggesting a solution, you’re taking an assertive stance. This approach is not confrontational but still communicates your feelings effectively.
This strategy allows you to stand up for yourself while fostering understanding and mutual respect in your relationships.
7) “No, I can’t commit to this right now…”
It can be challenging to say no, especially when you’re worried about disappointing others. But spreading yourself too thin and constantly saying yes to everything isn’t doing anyone any favors, least of all yourself.
This phrase is a clear and assertive way of setting boundaries. It shows that you value your time and energy and aren’t afraid to prioritize what’s important to you.
It’s not about being rude or dismissive. It’s about understanding your limits and making decisions that align with your needs and capabilities.
Remember, saying no when necessary is not selfish. It’s an essential part of self-care and maintaining healthy relationships.
By being honest about what you can and cannot commit to, you’re showing respect for yourself and others.
8) “I value our relationship and want to address this issue…”
There will be times when difficult conversations are necessary.
In these moments, starting with “I value our relationship and want to address this issue…” can set a positive tone and show that your intention is to resolve the problem, not escalate it.
This phrase communicates that the relationship is important to you and that you’re willing to put in the effort to address any issues head-on.
It’s an assertive way of tackling problems while reinforcing the value of the relationship.
In the realm of respect, nothing speaks louder than valuing relationships and addressing issues directly. When you handle sensitive situations with honesty, care, and assertiveness, you command respect from others.
Wrapping it up
Assertiveness is about more than just expressing your thoughts or standing your ground – it’s a way to uphold your self-respect and earn the respect of others.
This article has shared eight assertive phrases that can boost your communication skills, but at the end of the day, it’s not just about the words you use. It’s about how you value yourself and others.
Remember, every conversation is an opportunity to practice these phrases. Yet, true respect comes from being genuine and sincere in your interactions.
Here’s to embracing assertiveness and building stronger, more respectful relationships.