Navigating social interactions can sometimes feel like traversing a minefield, especially when it comes to dealing with fake people. These are individuals who say one thing but mean another, hiding their true intentions behind a veil of insincerity.

Psychology offers us some insight into the common phrases these individuals use. It’s an interesting exploration and one that can help us better understand the people around us.

In this article,  we’ll delve into the telltale signs that someone may not be as genuine as they seem.

Sit tight and get ready for some psychological insights that might just change the way you perceive your interactions.

1) I’m always here for you

One of the most common phrases that psychologists have identified as a telltale sign of insincerity is “I’m always here for you”. Now, this isn’t to say that everyone who uses this phrase is being fake. Far from it.

However, it’s important to remember that actions speak louder than words. Fake individuals often use this phrase as a way to appear supportive and caring, without the need for any follow through.

If someone constantly tells you they’re always there for you, but disappears when you actually need help or support, there’s a good chance they might not be as genuine as they seem.

The key here is to look at their actions. Are they consistent with their words?

If not, it could be a sign that they’re not being entirely truthful with you. As in all things, consistency is a clear indicator of sincerity.

2) Trust me

Another phrase that fake people often use is “Trust me”. It seems like a harmless enough statement, right? But when it’s used excessively, it can actually be a red flag.

Let me share a personal example. I once had a friend who would constantly reassure me with the phrase “trust me”. Whether it was about decisions related to work, relationships or even trivial things like where to eat, she’d always say, “Trust me, it’s the best option.”

Over time, I noticed a pattern. Her advice often led to negative outcomes for me. When I confronted her about it, she brushed it off saying that she was just trying to help. That’s when I realized that her “trust me” wasn’t really about my best interest, but more about exerting control over the situation.

Watch out for an overuse of the phrase “trust me”. It could be an attempt to manipulate rather than genuine advice based on your best interests.

3) I never lie

“I never lie” is another phrase often used by individuals who aren’t as genuine as they appear. The irony here is that studies show everyone lies at some point, whether it’s a little white lie or a more significant deception.

Research conducted by the University of Massachusetts found that 60% of adults can’t have a ten-minute conversation without lying at least once. More intriguingly, the study discovered that those lies are more often told by people who were trying to appear likable and competent.

Therefore, when someone constantly insists they “never lie”, it could be an attempt to create a false image of honesty and reliability.

In reality, it might be covering up their insincerity. It’s always best to judge people by their actions rather than their words alone.

4) I hate drama

The phrase “I hate drama” is another one to watch out for. It might seem like a clear statement from someone who prefers peace and simplicity, but in many cases, it’s quite the opposite.

Often, those who declare their disdain for drama are the very ones stirring it up. By proclaiming their aversion to drama, they manage to divert suspicion away from themselves and paint a picture of being the calm in the storm.

However, if you notice that drama seems to follow them wherever they go, it might be time to question if they’re as innocent as they claim. It’s not always the case, but it’s certainly something to keep an eye on.

5) I’m sorry you feel that way

“I’m sorry you feel that way” can sometimes be a veiled non-apology. It’s a phrase that can subtly shift the blame onto the person on the receiving end, rather than taking responsibility for any wrongdoing.

Instead of expressing genuine remorse for their actions or words, the person using this phrase is essentially saying they’re sorry that you’re upset, not that they’ve done something to upset you.

In essence, it’s a way for them to acknowledge your feelings without admitting any fault. It’s an attempt to placate you without addressing the actual problem, and it’s a common tactic used by people who aren’t being genuine.

6) You’re just too sensitive

“You’re just too sensitive” is a phrase that can be particularly hurtful. It’s a method of invalidating your feelings and making you question your own reactions.

When someone tells you that you’re being too sensitive, it can feel like a personal attack on your emotions and experiences. It’s as though they’re telling you that your feelings don’t matter or that they’re over the top.

It’s important to remember that everyone has the right to their own feelings and reactions. If someone consistently uses this phrase in response to your genuine concerns or feelings, it may be a sign that they’re not as trustworthy as they seem.

A genuine person will respect your feelings and try to understand them, not dismiss them.

7) I’m not mad, just disappointed

“I’m not mad, just disappointed” is another phrase that can be a red flag. It’s a way of expressing disapproval that can feel even more cutting than anger.

I remember hearing this phrase from a friend after a slight misunderstanding. Instead of addressing the issue directly and giving me the chance to explain, they used this phrase as a way to express their displeasure.

It felt like they had put me in a position where I was not only wrong but had also let them down. It was a manipulative way of making me feel guilty without giving me room for defence or explanation.

Watch out for this phrase – it’s often used by people who want to control the narrative and make you feel guilty without having an open conversation about the issue at hand.

8) I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but…

“I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but…” is another phrase that can be a telltale sign of someone being insincere. It’s often used as a precursor to a negative or critical statement and is a way of cushioning the blow while still delivering the hurtful message.

The problem is that it can come across as if they’re doing you a favor by being brutally honest, when in reality, they’re just using it as an excuse to say something potentially hurtful.

True friends and genuine people will offer constructive criticism when needed, but they’ll also know how to do it in a way that’s respectful and considerate. They won’t use this kind of false pretext to deliver their message.

9) Just kidding

“Just kidding” is a phrase that can be used to mask hurtful comments under the guise of humor. It’s a way for insincere people to express their true feelings or thoughts without taking responsibility for the impact of their words.

The most important thing to remember is that humor should never be used as a tool to belittle or hurt someone. Genuine people understand this and use humor to bring joy, not to disguise criticism or unkind remarks.

If you’re regularly on the receiving end of hurtful “jokes” followed by a quick “just kidding”, it could be a sign that the person isn’t being genuine with you.

You have the right to express your discomfort and ask for respect in your interactions.

Final thoughts: It’s about empathy

At the heart of all human interaction lies empathy – the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It’s what binds us, helps us navigate social complexities, and fosters genuine connections.

In dealing with insincere people, it’s crucial to remember that their actions often stem from their own insecurities and struggles. It doesn’t excuse their behavior, but it might help us respond with kindness and understanding.

Ultimately, you have a right to surround yourself with people who respect you and your feelings. If someone consistently uses these phrases in a way that undermines your worth or belittles your emotions, it might be time to reconsider the role they play in your life.

Remember, words hold power. They can build bridges or walls. So let’s strive to use them wisely and foster authenticity in our interactions.

After all, as Maya Angelou once said: “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”