9 strategies for managing up with an arrogant boss

Graeme Richards by Graeme Richards | March 18, 2024, 3:50 pm

There’s a significant difference between managing up and sucking up.

Managing up is all about working effectively with a boss who may not be the easiest to get along with, while keeping your integrity intact.

Sucking up, on the other hand, is a dishonest attempt to win favor from your boss, often at the expense of your own self-respect.

Managing up, especially when dealing with an arrogant boss, requires the right strategies. And believe me, I know that this isn’t always easy.

Yet, smart employees know that there are certain strategies that can help them manage up without resorting to sycophancy.

Here are some strategies to help you manage up with an arrogant boss.

1) Understand their perspective

In any work environment, understanding is key. This is especially true when dealing with an arrogant boss.

Arrogant bosses often believe they are the smartest people in the room. They may not value your input or even listen to your ideas.

But instead of getting frustrated, try to see things from their perspective.

Understanding why they act the way they do can help you find ways to work with them effectively. It could be that their arrogance stems from insecurity or a need for control.

This doesn’t excuse their behavior, but it can help you strategize your approach.

Make an effort to understand their motivations and you might just find the key to managing up with your arrogant boss – without compromising your own values or dignity.

Remember, it’s not about pandering to them; it’s about finding a way to work together effectively.

2) Choose your battles wisely

When it comes to dealing with an arrogant boss, I’ve learned the hard way that it’s crucial to pick your battles wisely.

I remember back in my early career, I had a boss who loved to be right. All the time. It didn’t matter if it was a small detail or a major decision, he hated being contradicted.

One day, I decided to stand up to him on a trivial issue. The result? A full-blown argument that left both of us stressed and strained our working relationship for weeks.

I realized then that it wasn’t worth fighting over every little thing. Instead, I started focusing on what’s really important – the bigger issues that directly impacted our team’s performance or the company’s bottom line.

So, my advice is – choose your battles wisely. Stand up when it matters but let the small stuff slide. It will not only preserve your working relationship but also keep you sane in the long run.

3) Practice active listening

Active listening is a communication technique where the listener fully engages with the speaker, both verbally and non-verbally. It’s more than just hearing the words – it’s about understanding the message being conveyed.

Interestingly, research shows that we only remember between 25 percent and 50 percent of what we hear. This means, when you talk to your boss for 10 minutes, they pay attention to less than half of the conversation.

By practicing active listening, you can demonstrate to your arrogant boss that you value their thoughts and ideas, even if they don’t always do the same for you. This can help to build a more positive working relationship.

So, when your boss is talking, give them your undivided attention. Show that you’re engaged with nods and affirmations. And always clarify points to ensure you’ve understood correctly. This simple technique could be a game-changer in managing up with an arrogant boss.

4) Foster a positive environment

Arrogant bosses can often create a negative atmosphere. They may belittle others or create a culture of fear. It’s easy to get dragged down by this and respond with negativity yourself.

But here’s the thing – negativity breeds negativity.

Instead, focus on creating a positive environment. Compliment your boss on their good ideas, acknowledge their expertise when it’s due, and highlight the positives in any situation.

It might seem like a small thing, but fostering positivity can have a significant impact. It can help to shift the overall mood and even influence your boss’s behavior.

Remember, positivity is infectious. And it could be just what you need to effectively manage up with an arrogant boss.

5) Maintain your professionalism

When dealing with an arrogant boss, it can be easy to let your emotions get the best of you. You might feel like retaliating or stooping to their level.

But let me assure you, this is not the route to take.

No matter how your boss behaves, it’s essential to maintain your professionalism. Keep your interactions polite and respectful, keep your emotions in check, and don’t engage in office gossip or petty squabbles.

This not only protects your reputation, but it also sends a clear message to your boss that you won’t be dragged into unprofessional behaviour.

Maintaining professionalism in the face of arrogance is a powerful strategy for managing up. It demonstrates your maturity and sets a positive example for others to follow.

6) Take care of yourself

Dealing with an arrogant boss can be mentally and emotionally draining. The constant clashes and tension can take a toll on your well-being.

In the midst of all this, it’s crucial to remember to take care of yourself.

Make sure you’re eating well, getting enough sleep, and taking time out to relax and unwind. This might mean taking a walk during lunch, practicing mindfulness, or indulging in a hobby you love.

Remember, you’re not alone. Reach out to friends, family, or a mental health professional if things get tough. There’s no shame in seeking help.

Taking care of your mental health isn’t just about surviving a difficult boss. It’s about preserving your self-worth and ensuring you’re at your best, both at work and outside it.

Because at the end of the day, no job is worth sacrificing your well-being over.

7) Develop a support network

I remember a time when I felt utterly isolated at work due to an arrogant boss. It was as if I was alone on an island, battling the stormy seas with no help in sight.

That’s when I realized the importance of a support network.

I started reaching out to my colleagues, not to gossip or complain about our boss, but to share experiences, offer support, and seek advice. Slowly, I found myself surrounded by people who understood what I was going through and offered invaluable guidance.

Having a support network at work can be a lifeline when dealing with an arrogant boss. It can provide emotional support, practical advice, and even a little humor to lighten the mood on tough days.

Don’t underestimate the power of camaraderie in the workplace. It can make even the most challenging situations bearable.

8) Keep improving yourself

Dealing with an arrogant boss can be a challenge, but it’s also an opportunity for personal growth.

No matter how difficult your boss is, there is always something you can learn from them. It could be a new skill, a different approach to problem-solving, or even what not to do in a leadership role.

Use this experience to improve yourself. Seek out training opportunities, take on new tasks, and don’t shy away from challenges. The more skilled and confident you become, the better equipped you’ll be to handle your boss’s arrogance.

Remember, every difficult situation is a chance for you to grow stronger and more resilient. Embrace it.

9) Know your worth

The most important thing you should remember when dealing with an arrogant boss is to know your worth.

Arrogant bosses can be demeaning and may make you doubt your capabilities. But remember, their arrogance is a reflection of their character, not your competence.

You are valuable. Your work matters. And no one has the right to make you feel otherwise.

Stand firm in your knowledge and abilities. Don’t let anyone shake your confidence or make you feel less than you are.

Knowing your worth is not just a strategy for managing up with an arrogant boss. It’s a crucial part of maintaining your self-esteem and dignity in any situation.

Final thoughts: It’s about empowerment

The crux of managing up, especially with an arrogant boss, revolves around empowerment.

You see, your professional journey is not just about your tasks and responsibilities, but also how you navigate interpersonal relationships within the workplace.

Dealing with an arrogant boss can be challenging, but it’s also an opportunity for you to grow, learn and assert yourself.

Remember the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

It’s in your hands to take charge, implement these strategies and create a professional environment that respects and values you.

So, instead of feeling overwhelmed or intimidated by an arrogant boss, consider it a pathway to bettering yourself and strengthening your resolve.

After all, every experience – good or bad – shapes us. And every person we encounter on our professional journey, even the most difficult ones, offers us lessons that contribute to our growth.