There’s a thin line between being assertive and being difficult.

Being assertive means standing up for yourself and expressing your thoughts openly. But being difficult? That’s a whole different ball game. It’s when you’re always at odds with others, creating unnecessary hurdles and tension.

Psychology has some interesting insights into this phenomenon. There are certain traits that truly difficult people often have in common.

In this article, we’re going to delve into 9 signs that you’re actually a very difficult person, according to psychology. Trust me, it’s an eye-opener!

1) You’re always right

There’s a saying in psychology – “Would you rather be right, or would you rather be happy?”

This refers to the tendency of some people to always insist they’re correct, no matter what. This is a common trait among difficult people, according to psychology.

Being firm on your convictions is one thing. But refusing to consider other perspectives or admit when you’re wrong? That’s a whole different story.

It’s not just about being stubborn. This kind of attitude can strain relationships and shut down productive conversations. It can make it hard for others to feel heard or respected when interacting with you.

And let me tell you this – it’s exhausting for everyone involved.

2) Always playing the victim

Here’s a personal example that might hit home.

I remember a friend of mine who always seemed to be in the middle of some drama. He had a knack for making himself the victim in every scenario, even when he was clearly at fault. It was as if the world was against him and he was just an innocent bystander.

Psychology points out that this tendency to constantly play the victim is a common trait among difficult people. It’s a way of avoiding responsibility and shifting blame onto others.

So, if you find yourself blaming others for your problems, or if every story you tell paints you as the innocent party, it might be time to reflect. Is it really the world that’s against you? Or are you possibly contributing to your own problems?

3) Inability to empathize

Empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is a fundamental aspect of human interaction. It’s what allows us to connect with others on a deep, emotional level.

However, some people struggle with this. They find it difficult to put themselves in someone else’s shoes or to view situations from another person’s perspective.

According to a study, individuals who exhibit lower levels of empathy are often seen as more difficult to deal with. This lack of understanding can lead to conflict and tension in relationships, both personal and professional.

So if you’re finding it hard to empathize with others, it might be an indicator that you’re a difficult person.

4) Constantly interrupting

Have you ever been in a conversation where you can’t even finish your sentence because the other person keeps jumping in? It’s frustrating, isn’t it?

This constant interruption is another sign of a difficult person. It shows a lack of respect for others and a need to dominate the conversation.

We all get excited and want to share our thoughts, but constantly interrupting others can lead to feelings of annoyance and disrespect.

Good communication involves active listening, not just speaking.

So if you find yourself constantly interrupting others, it might be time to work on your communication skills. Remember, a conversation is a two-way street.

5) You’re never satisfied

There’s nothing wrong with having high standards. In fact, it can be a good thing. It drives us to improve and achieve our best. However, there’s a difference between setting high standards and being perpetually unsatisfied.

Difficult people often fall into the latter category. They are rarely content with what they have or what others do for them. There’s always something to criticize or complain about. This constant dissatisfaction can be draining for those around them.

If you find that you’re never happy with what you have or what others do for you, it’s worth reflecting on why that might be. Don’t let chronic dissatisfaction turn you into a difficult person to be around.

6) You struggle to forgive and forget

We’ve all been hurt or let down at some point. It’s part of life. But how we handle these situations can say a lot about us as people.

Some of us can forgive, learn from the experience, and move on. But for others, it’s not so easy. They hold onto grudges, dwelling on past wrongs and nursing resentment. This inability to let go can create a wall of bitterness and negativity around them.

If you’re finding it hard to forgive and forget, I understand. It’s tough. But holding onto grudges only hurts you in the long run. Letting go can be a powerful step towards becoming a more understanding, less difficult person.

7) Difficulty with change

Change isn’t always easy. Believe me, I know.

A few years back, my job required me to relocate to a different city. The thought of leaving my comfort zone, my friends, and my familiar surroundings was daunting. But I realized that resisting change only made things harder.

This resistance to change is another characteristic of difficult people. They prefer predictability and routine, often to the point of being rigid and inflexible. This can make them hard to deal with in situations that require adaptability and compromise.

If you find yourself resisting change, take a deep breath. It’s okay to be scared. But remember, growth often happens outside our comfort zones.

8) Always needing to have the last word

We all enjoy being right. It’s gratifying and it validates our point of view. But for some people, being right isn’t enough. They need to have the last word in every discussion.

This need to always end a conversation or argument on their terms is another sign of a difficult person. It’s not just about proving a point, it’s about asserting dominance and maintaining control.

9) Lack of self-awareness

Ultimately, the most significant sign of a difficult person is a lack of self-awareness. They’re often unaware of how their actions and behaviors affect others.

This lack of self-awareness can be detrimental, leading to misunderstandings, conflicts, and strained relationships. It prevents personal growth and leaves little room for improvement.

So if you’re reading this, take a moment to reflect. Understanding how you’re perceived by others is the first step towards self-improvement and becoming a less difficult person.