Spotting whether someone genuinely doesn’t like you can be a tough task. Sometimes, people mask their true feelings behind politeness and niceties, making it hard to decipher their real intentions.

I’m Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit, and I’ve used my understanding of psychology to pick out the subtle cues when someone simply isn’t your fan.

In this article, I’ll share with you the 9 psychological signs that may indicate someone doesn’t like you. It’s important to remember that these are just signs, not definitive proof. But if you notice several of them from the same person, it might be time to question how they truly feel about you.

Ready to uncover the truth? Let’s dive in.

1) They avoid eye contact

Eye contact is a universal language, a non-verbal way of expressing interest or apathy. It’s something we all do unconsciously.

When someone likes you, they’ll naturally gravitate towards making more eye contact with you. Their eyes will light up, and they’ll be more focused on you during conversations.

However, if someone consistently avoids making eye contact, it could be a sign they don’t like you. This doesn’t mean a fleeting glance away or occasional distraction. We’re talking about a consistent pattern of avoiding your gaze.

This is just one sign to look out for. Let’s move on to the next one.

2) Their body language is closed off

Body language is another powerful non-verbal tool that can reveal a person’s true feelings.

Open body language, such as facing you with their whole body, often suggests a person is comfortable and engaged. On the other hand, closed-off body language, like crossed arms or turning their body away, can indicate discomfort or disinterest.

For instance, I once had a colleague who was always polite and professional in conversation, but I noticed his body language was often closed off when we interacted. He would cross his arms, lean back in his chair, and rarely turned his whole body towards me during discussions.

At first, I brushed it off, thinking maybe he was just having a bad day. But as this pattern continued over time, I began to suspect he wasn’t my biggest fan. And eventually, other signs confirmed my suspicion.

Remember, body language can vary greatly between individuals and cultures, so it’s important not to rely solely on this sign. But if it’s part of a consistent pattern of behavior from someone, it could be a sign they don’t particularly like you.

3) They consistently interrupt you

Interruptions during a conversation can be a subtle sign of disrespect. When someone frequently interrupts you, it might mean they value their thoughts and opinions more than yours.

According to Deborah Tannen, a renowned sociolinguist, conversational styles can vary significantly depending on a person’s upbringing and cultural background. Some people are raised in ‘high-involvement’ conversational styles where interruption is seen as active engagement, while others come from ‘high-considerateness’ styles where interrupting is considered rude.

Regardless of cultural differences, if you find that someone repeatedly interrupts you, while they patiently listen to and engage with others, it might indicate they simply don’t like you.

Remember, this is just one sign. It’s helpful to observe if they interrupt others as frequently or if it’s just you who’s being cut off in conversation.

4) They’re indifferent to your feelings

In the world of Buddhism, empathy and compassion are held in high regard. It’s about understanding and sharing the feelings of others.

If someone doesn’t like you, they might exhibit a lack of empathy towards you. They might seem indifferent or dismissive of your feelings and experiences.

In my book, “Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego“, I explore how the core teachings of Buddhism emphasize on empathy and compassion for fostering deep connections with others.

When someone is consistently indifferent to your feelings, it could be a strong indicator that they simply don’t like you. Of course, it’s important to remember that everyone has off days or might be dealing with personal issues that could affect their ability to empathize.

However, a consistent pattern of indifference is definitely something to take note of. If you want to learn more about this concept, you can find my book on Amazon here. 

5) They never initiate contact

One of the most telling signs that someone might not like you is if they never initiate contact. In any healthy relationship, be it friendship or romance, there should be a balance in who initiates conversation or hangouts.

I remember a time when I was always the one reaching out to a friend. I was the one suggesting we catch up, the one initiating conversations, and often, the one carrying them. It felt like a one-sided effort.

I began to question whether this person truly valued our friendship. When I decided to stop initiating contact, the silence spoke volumes.

Now, it’s essential to bear in mind that people get busy and life can get in the way. But if you notice over time that you’re always the one making an effort to maintain the relationship, it could be a sign that they simply don’t like you as much as you thought.

6) They’re overly polite

This one might seem counter-intuitive. After all, isn’t politeness a good thing?

Well, yes and no. Politeness is indeed a virtue, but when it’s overdone, it can sometimes mask true feelings.

When someone is overly polite or formal with you, especially when they’re casual or relaxed with others, it might be a sign that they’re putting distance between you. They might be using politeness as a barrier to keep you at arm’s length.

While this isn’t a surefire sign of dislike on its own, when combined with other signs on this list, it could indicate that someone simply doesn’t like you. Remember, we’re looking for patterns of behavior here, not just isolated incidents.

7) They seldom smile at you

Smiling is a universal sign of friendliness and warmth. When someone genuinely likes you, they tend to smile at you more often.

However, if someone rarely smiles at you, it might indicate they don’t like you. This doesn’t mean they need to be beaming at you constantly. Genuine smiles can be subtle and brief, but they’re usually pretty easy to spot.

Of course, some people are naturally less expressive, or they might just be having a bad day. But if someone consistently doesn’t smile at you while they smile at others, it could be a sign of their true feelings.

8) They don’t remember personal details

One clear sign that someone values you and your relationship is when they remember personal details about you. Whether it’s your favorite book, the story of how you adopted your pet, or the name of your childhood best friend, these details matter.

On the flip side, if someone consistently forgets these details, it could suggest that they don’t particularly care or value your relationship.

I’ve been on both sides of this situation. I’ve had friends who remembered even the smallest details I shared with them. It made me feel seen and valued. On the other hand, I’ve also known people who repeatedly forgot key details about me. It was hard not to take it personally.

So, if someone is consistently forgetful about personal details you’ve shared with them, it might indicate they simply don’t like you.

9) They rarely make time for you

The most valuable thing we can give someone is our time. It’s a clear indication of where our priorities lie. If someone rarely makes time for you, it could be the most telling sign that they simply don’t like you.

When someone likes you, they’ll want to spend time with you. They’ll make an effort to fit you into their schedule, no matter how busy they might be.

If someone is constantly too busy for you, always cancelling plans, or never available when you need them, it could be a clear sign that they don’t value your relationship. Time is precious, and how we choose to spend it often reveals who and what matters most to us.