9 daily habits to boost your emotional intelligence, according to psychology

Graeme Richards by Graeme Richards | August 26, 2024, 11:59 pm

Building your emotional intelligence isn’t about mastering complex theories. It’s about ingraining simple, daily habits that allow you to understand and manage your emotions, and connect with others on a deeper level.

This is where psychology comes in, providing us with the tools to develop our emotional intelligence in a way that’s effective and practical.

So, I’ve compiled a list of 9 daily habits that can give your emotional intelligence the boost it needs. These are based on psychological studies, and are habits you can easily integrate into your routine.

Let’s dive into these habits and see how they can help you become a more emotionally intelligent individual.

1) Daily mindfulness

Psychology has a lot to say about the power of mindfulness. And it’s not just for yogis or meditation gurus.

Mindfulness is all about becoming aware of your thoughts and feelings without judging them. It’s about being present in the moment, and not getting swept up in your worries about the past or the future.

Why does this matter for emotional intelligence? Because being mindful helps you recognize your feelings and understand why you’re experiencing them.

That self-awareness is the first step to managing your emotions effectively, instead of letting them control you.

And the best part? You can practice mindfulness anywhere, anytime. Whether you’re washing dishes, walking to work, or waiting in line at the grocery store.

Start by taking a few moments each day to focus on your breath and observe your thoughts without trying to change them. It might feel a bit strange at first, but stick with it.

After all, building emotional intelligence is all about cultivating habits. And mindfulness is a habit worth developing.

2) Active listening

We’ve all been guilty of it. Someone’s talking to us, and we’re busy formulating our response in our head instead of really listening to what they’re saying. I know I have.

I remember a meeting with a team member where I was so focused on getting my point across that I completely missed the fact that she was feeling overwhelmed. It wasn’t until later, when she broke down in tears, that I realized I had failed to pick up on her emotional cues.

That’s when I really understood the importance of active listening.

Active listening isn’t just about hearing the words someone is saying. It’s about understanding their emotions, their intentions, and their perspective.

It’s about showing empathy and making the other person feel heard and valued.

From that day forward, I made a conscious effort to practice active listening in all my interactions. To pause and really listen before responding.

And guess what? Not only did it improve my relationships at work, but it also boosted my emotional intelligence by helping me become more attuned to others’ emotions.

So make active listening a daily habit. Whether you’re in a meeting at work or having a conversation with a friend or family member, take the time to truly listen. You might be surprised at what you learn.

3) Expressing gratitude

Gratitude isn’t just a nice sentiment, it’s a powerful tool for boosting your emotional intelligence.

A study conducted at the University of California, Davis found that people who regularly express gratitude experience greater emotional well-being and resilience in the face of stress.

This is because expressing gratitude shifts your focus from what’s wrong in your life to what’s right. It helps you to appreciate the good things and fosters positive emotions.

Making a daily habit of expressing gratitude can be as simple as writing down three things you’re grateful for each day. Or taking a moment to thank someone who’s made a difference in your life.

Over time, this practice can lead to increased empathy, improved relationships, and a greater understanding of your own and others’ emotions. It’s an easy habit to adopt, but the impact on your emotional intelligence can be profound.

4) Self-reflection

Understanding others starts with understanding ourselves. And that’s where self-reflection comes in.

Self-reflection is the act of setting aside some time to think about your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. It’s about asking yourself why you reacted a certain way, or why you felt a particular emotion.

This habit is crucial for emotional intelligence because it helps you to identify patterns in your emotions and behaviors. It allows you to understand what triggers certain emotional responses and how you can manage them better.

You can practice self-reflection by journaling, meditating, or even just taking a few minutes each day to think about your experiences and reactions.

Over time, the insights gained from self-reflection can lead to greater emotional awareness, better decision-making, and improved relationships.

5) Regular exercise

It might sound surprising, but regular exercise is actually a great way to boost your emotional intelligence.

Exercise releases endorphins, the feel-good hormones that help you feel happier and more positive. But more than that, it also helps you manage stress, improve your focus and boost your overall mental health.

When you’re physically active, you’re also likely to be more attuned to your body’s signals. This can help you better understand and regulate your emotions.

You don’t need to run a marathon or spend hours at the gym. Even a short walk or a few minutes of stretching can have a positive impact on your emotional intelligence.

So lace up those sneakers and make regular physical activity a part of your daily routine. Your emotional intelligence will thank you for it.

6) Practicing empathy

Empathy is at the heart of emotional intelligence. It’s about feeling with others, understanding their emotions, and responding with care.

But empathy isn’t always easy. Sometimes it requires us to step outside of our own experiences and imagine what it’s like to be in someone else’s shoes.

It’s a practice that can truly transform relationships. Whether it’s a coworker who’s having a tough day, or a friend who’s going through a breakup, showing genuine empathy can make a world of difference.

By making a conscious effort to practice empathy each day, you not only help others feel understood and valued, but you also deepen your own understanding of human emotions.

Remember, empathy isn’t about fixing someone else’s problems. It’s about being there, offering support, and understanding their feelings. And that’s a habit that can significantly boost your emotional intelligence.

7) Emotion labelling

There’s power in naming our emotions. It’s something I learned during a particularly challenging time in my life.

I was feeling overwhelmed, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was causing it. Until I started to label my emotions. Anxiety. Frustration. Loneliness. When I named them, they somehow felt less daunting.

This is because naming our emotions helps us to understand and manage them better.

When we label our emotions accurately, we are better able to recognize them when they arise and address them appropriately. It helps us to communicate more effectively and solve problems more efficiently.

So, the next time you’re feeling something, take a moment to label that emotion. Is it anger? Is it sadness? Or is it something else?

By doing this regularly, you’ll develop a greater awareness of your emotional landscape, which is a key aspect of emotional intelligence.

8) Seeking feedback

Nobody likes criticism. But feedback, when given constructively, is an invaluable tool for personal growth and emotional intelligence.

Seeking feedback from others helps you understand how your actions and emotions are perceived by others. It offers a different perspective, one that can help you become more self-aware and develop better interpersonal skills.

It’s important to approach feedback with an open mind. Remember, it’s not about taking things personally or getting defensive. It’s about learning and growth.

Whether it’s at work or in your personal life, make a habit of seeking feedback from others. You might be surprised at what you learn about yourself, and how it can help boost your emotional intelligence.

9) Continuous learning

The journey to emotional intelligence is not a destination, but a continuous process of learning and growth.

Whether it’s reading books, attending workshops, or simply staying curious about human emotions and behaviors, continuous learning is key.

It’s about deepening your understanding of yourself and others. It’s about gaining new insights and applying them in your daily life.

Keep in mind that boosting your emotional intelligence doesn’t happen overnight. But with consistent effort, the habits you cultivate can lead to profound changes in how you understand and interact with the world around you.

Emotional intelligence: A lifelong journey

Emotional intelligence should never be viewed as a final destination, but rather as a lifelong journey. It’s an exploration of our inner selves, a continuous effort to understand, manage, and connect with our emotions and those of others.

At the heart of this journey is the concept of neuroplasticity – the brain’s ability to reorganize itself by forming new neural connections throughout life. Research has shown that the brain can change and adapt, even in adulthood.

This means that emotional intelligence is not fixed. It can be cultivated and improved over time through consistent practice and habits, like the nine we’ve discussed in this article.

So whether you’re practicing mindfulness, expressing gratitude, or seeking feedback, remember that you’re not just developing habits. You’re shaping your brain and your emotional landscape.

And the beauty of it all? The more you practice these habits, the more natural they become. They become ingrained in your daily routine, influencing your actions, decisions, and interactions with others.

So keep learning, keep growing, and embrace the journey towards emotional intelligence. After all, it’s a journey that enriches your life and deepens your connection with yourself and others.