In life, we all strive to surround ourselves with genuinely kind people. But how can we be sure we’re not mistaking politeness for actual kindness?

Psychology offers some insightful ways to discern this.

Being able to spot a truly kind person isn’t just about seeing who holds the door open for others or tosses a smile your way. It goes deeper than that.

In this piece, we’ll explore 8 psychological indicators that someone is genuinely kind. These are the subtle signs that show you’re dealing with a person who is authentically good-hearted. Let’s dive in, shall we?

1) They show empathy

When we talk about kindness, empathy often takes center stage.

Why? Because a kind person has the capacity to truly understand and share the feelings of others. They can put themselves in your shoes, imagine what you’re going through, and respond with genuine compassion.

Psychology supports this. Research has consistently shown that empathy is one of the key markers of a genuinely kind person.

It’s not just about being nice when everything’s going well. A truly kind person is there with understanding and support when you’re in the trenches too.

When you meet someone who’s genuinely empathetic, it’s usually a good sign that you’re dealing with a kind-hearted individual.

So look out for those who show real empathy – it’s a surefire sign of authentic kindness.

2) They are genuinely happy for others

Let me tell you about a friend of mine, let’s call her Jane.

Jane is the kind of person who radiates kindness in everything she does. And one of the most telling signs of her genuine kindness is her ability to feel genuine happiness for others.

For example, when I got a promotion last year, she was over the moon for me. It wasn’t just a polite “congratulations” – she was genuinely thrilled, almost as if it had happened to her.

According to psychology, this ability to feel joy for others – a trait known as ‘compersion’ – is a clear indicator of a genuinely kind person.

So, if you spot someone who can truly rejoice in other people’s success, just like Jane, chances are, you’ve got a genuinely kind person on your hands.

3) They practice patience

Patience is often seen as a virtue, and for good reason. It’s a quality that goes hand in hand with kindness.

While it’s easy to lose our cool in frustrating situations, genuinely kind people have an uncanny ability to remain patient. They don’t rush others, and they’re understanding when things don’t go as planned.

Interestingly, a study published in the Journal of Personality found that patient people tend to be more empathetic and generous. The research suggests that patience might not just be a virtue, but a marker of genuine kindness.

So, if someone consistently shows patience – even in stressful or difficult situations – it’s a strong sign they’re authentically kind.

4) They are good listeners

In today’s fast-paced world, finding a good listener can sometimes feel like searching for a needle in a haystack.

However, those who truly excel at listening to others are often the kindest souls. They don’t just hear your words – they understand your feelings and thoughts behind them.

Genuinely kind people value your perspective, and they show it by giving you their full attention. They don’t interrupt or rush you, but instead, encourage you to express yourself fully.

So if someone gives you the space to speak your mind and pays attention to every word, you’ve likely spotted a genuinely kind person.

5) They are generous with their time

Time is one of the most precious things we have. And when someone chooses to spend their time on you – not because they have to, but because they want to – it’s a powerful expression of kindness.

Genuinely kind people understand this. They’re willing to put their own needs aside to help others, be it lending a listening ear, helping with a task, or simply being there when needed.

Their generosity isn’t about grand gestures or attention-seeking. It’s about the small, heartfelt acts they do every day, often behind the scenes.

So if you notice someone who is generous with their time, consider it a telltale sign of their genuine kindness.

6) They acknowledge others

I remember a time when I was having a particularly bad day. I felt invisible and unimportant, as if no one would notice if I wasn’t there. That’s when a colleague of mine, someone who I considered to be truly kind, surprised me.

They took the time to acknowledge me, not just with a simple hello but by asking me how I was doing and genuinely listening to my response. This small act made me feel seen and valued.

Acknowledging others is a quality that’s often overlooked but is a key indicator of genuine kindness. It shows that the person is not just self-focused but is truly interested in others.

So if you come across someone who takes the time to acknowledge others, even in the smallest ways, it’s likely that they are genuinely kind.

7) They express gratitude

Gratitude is a beautiful quality that’s often associated with kindness.

When someone is genuinely kind, they appreciate the people and circumstances that bring joy and positivity into their lives. They don’t take these things for granted but recognize and express their gratitude for them.

Genuinely kind people often say “thank you” and mean it. They appreciate the efforts of others, no matter how small.

So, if you spot someone who regularly expresses their gratitude, it’s a surefire sign that you’re dealing with a genuinely kind person.

8) They display kindness without expecting anything in return

The most beautiful aspect of genuine kindness is its selflessness. True kindness expects nothing in return. It’s not a transaction or a strategy for personal gain. It’s simply an act of love and compassion towards others.

Genuinely kind people help others because they believe it’s the right thing to do, not because they expect to be rewarded or acknowledged for it.

This is the essence of genuine kindness – it’s unconditional, selfless, and pure. If you come across someone who embodies this trait, you can be sure of their authentic kindness.

Final thoughts: The essence of genuine kindness

Genuine kindness, in its purest form, is a reflection of the human spirit. It’s an innate quality that transcends borders, cultures, and languages.

According to psychology, genuine kindness isn’t just about doing good deeds. It’s about empathy, patience, acknowledgment, and the capacity to rejoice at the success of others. It’s about being selfless, grateful and generous with one’s time.

Remember the words of renowned psychologist Carl Rogers: “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” This quote may seem unrelated, but it holds a profound truth. Genuine kindness begins with self-acceptance and self-love. Only then can we extend our kindness to others without any expectations in return.

As we navigate through life, let’s remember these markers of genuine kindness. Not just to recognize it in others, but also to cultivate it within ourselves. After all, genuine kindness has the power to transform our world in ways we can barely imagine.