8 ways to recognize the hidden anger of a patient person

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | June 5, 2024, 1:33 pm

It’s a common misconception that patient people never get angry. But they do, they just hide it well.

Spotting hidden anger in someone known for their patience can be tricky. It’s often subtle, tucked away behind calm demeanors and kind smiles.

But if you know what to look for, it’s not impossible. There are certain tell-tale signs that even the most patient person can’t hide when they’re truly upset.

So, let’s dive into the “8 ways to recognize the hidden anger of a patient person”. Let’s unmask those hidden emotions and understand the art of reading between the lines.

1) Unusual silence

We all know that silence doesn’t always mean peace. Sometimes, it’s a storm brewing underneath.

Patient people are often associated with calm and composed behavior. They express their thoughts carefully and are seldom caught in a heated argument.

But when they’re angry, this behavior can take a drastic turn. They might become unusually silent. This isn’t their typical thoughtful silence but a heavy, heated one.

It’s their way of controlling the anger, preventing it from spilling out. However, this silence can be a clear sign of hidden anger.

Recognizing this pattern can help you understand when a patient person is feeling upset, without them having to say a word. But remember, it’s crucial to approach the situation with sensitivity and respect, not to exacerbate the situation.

2) Avoidance behavior

Another sign of hidden anger is when a patient person starts avoiding you. Let me share a personal story to illustrate this.

A few years ago, I had a friend named Sam. Sam was known for his patience. No matter how chaotic the situation, he managed to keep his cool. But there was a time when we had a disagreement over something.

I could tell something was off, but he didn’t show any explicit signs of anger. However, I started to notice that he began avoiding me. He would suddenly become busy when I wanted to hang out or he would cut our conversations short.

It was unlike Sam, who was always ready for a chat or a spontaneous trip. That’s when it hit me – this was his way of expressing his anger. The avoidance wasn’t because he was busy; he was upset and didn’t know how to confront the situation.

So if you notice that a normally patient person is avoiding you, it might be a sign that they’re upset about something. It’s worth gently digging deeper to uncover what might be bothering them.

3) Change in body language

Body language is a powerful communicator, often revealing more than words. It’s especially true for patient people when they are angry.

Research into human behavior and psychology has shown that even the most patient individuals exhibit certain changes in their body language when they’re upset. They might cross their arms, avoid eye contact or have a rigid posture.

These subtle shifts can say a lot about their emotional state. It’s their non-verbal way of expressing the anger they’re trying to hide.

By paying close attention to these changes, you can pick up on the unspoken feelings of a patient person and address the issue before it escalates.

4) Sarcastic remarks

Sarcasm can often be a disguise for anger. Even patient people who are usually polite and respectful might resort to sarcastic remarks when they’re upset.

They may use sarcasm as a way to vent their frustration without outwardly expressing their anger. This allows them to maintain their patient demeanor, while subtly expressing their discontent.

So if you notice a sudden increase in sarcastic comments from a usually patient person, it could be a sign of hidden anger. It’s important not to brush off these remarks as jokes but to address the underlying issue.

5) Tearfulness

Believe it or not, patient people are also humans with a full spectrum of emotions. When they’re angry, they might not shout or argue, but might express their anger through tears.

Tears are often associated with sadness, but they can also be a release of frustration and pent-up anger. It’s an emotional outlet for those who might struggle to express their anger in more direct ways.

If you see a usually patient person welling up, it could be a sign of hidden anger. In such cases, offering a comforting presence and a listening ear can go a long way towards resolving the issue. Remember, it’s not just about recognizing the signs of hidden anger, but also about responding with kindness and understanding.

6) Change in routine

I’ve always been an early bird, waking up at the crack of dawn to start my day. But there was a time when I found myself hitting the snooze button more often than not. I was going through a period of frustration and anger, and it affected my daily routine.

Patient people, too, might exhibit changes in their routine when they are angry. They could deviate from their usual habits or adopt new ones as a way to cope with their hidden anger.

They might start skipping their morning run, showing up late to work, or even changing their eating habits. These changes can seem insignificant but can be a clear sign of internal turmoil.

So if you notice a disruption in the usual routine of a patient person, it might be worth checking in with them to see if everything’s okay.

7) Expressing frustration through hobbies

Remember how some people hit the gym harder when they’re upset? Or how others might dive into a painting session when they’re feeling down? Patient people are no different.

When they’re dealing with hidden anger, patient individuals might channel their emotions into their hobbies. They could be spending more time on these activities, or they could approach them with unusual intensity.

So if you notice a normally calm and patient friend suddenly picking up their guitar more often or going for longer runs, it could be a sign that they’re dealing with some hidden anger.

It’s not always a bad thing, as hobbies can be a healthy outlet for stress. But it’s essential to recognize these signs and engage in open conversations to address any underlying issues.

8) Withdrawal from social interactions

The most significant sign of hidden anger in a patient person could be their withdrawal from social interactions. While everyone needs some alone time, a sudden increase in isolation can indicate suppressed anger.

They might start declining invitations or avoiding group gatherings. These actions are not meant to offend, but rather to protect themselves and others from the anger they’re experiencing.

It’s essential to respect their need for space, but at the same time, let them know you’re there for them when they’re ready to talk. A balanced approach can help address the issue without aggravating their feelings.

Wrapping it up: It’s about understanding

Recognizing the hidden anger of patient people is not about labelling or judging them. It’s about understanding, empathy and creating a safe space for open communication.

Remember, every person expresses their emotions differently. While some may wear their feelings on their sleeves, others, like patient people, may choose to hide their anger.

These signs we’ve discussed are just indicators. They’re not definitive proof of anger but subtle hints that something might be off.

The key here is not to rush them or push them to express their anger. Instead, let them know that you’re there for them, ready to listen when they’re ready to talk.

After all, patience is not just about keeping calm amidst chaos; it’s also about waiting for the right moment to express yourself. And as friends and loved ones, it’s our role to provide that space and understanding.

So next time you notice these signs in a patient person, approach the situation with kindness and empathy. You might be the confidante they need in that moment.