8 ways to let go of others’ opinions and live life on your own terms

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | December 9, 2024, 5:55 am

Living life by other people’s standards and expectations can feel like walking on a tightrope. You’re constantly swaying, trying to keep balance, afraid of falling off.

Choosing to let go of others’ opinions and start living life on your own terms might seem daunting, but it’s liberating.

In this journey of self-discovery and independence, there are tricks that can guide you. I’m going to share with you eight ways that have helped me shrug off the weight of others’ opinions and start truly living my own life.

Here’s a sneak peek into an article titled “8 ways to let go of others’ opinions and live life on your own terms”. Enjoy the ride!

1) Understand your values

Living life on your own terms starts with understanding what those terms are.

Each one of us has a set of values that we hold dear. These are the guiding principles that shape our decisions, actions, and ultimately, our lives.

However, when we’re swayed by others’ opinions, it’s often because we haven’t clearly defined or understood our own values. We end up adopting others’ standards as our own, leading to a life that doesn’t truly reflect who we are.

Take some time to introspect and identify your core values. What do you stand for? What are the non-negotiables in your life?

Once you have a clear understanding of your values, you’ll find it easier to let go of others’ opinions. You won’t be easily swayed because you know what matters most to you.

Remember, this is about living life on YOUR terms. Not anyone else’s. It’s not about being stubborn or dismissive of others, but about standing firm in what you believe in.

So go ahead, take that first step towards self-discovery. Understand your values.

2) Practice saying ‘no’

One of the most liberating realizations in my life was learning the power of saying ‘no’.

For a long time, I was a people pleaser. I wanted to be liked, so I would say ‘yes’ to almost everything. Whether it was for a project at work I didn’t have time for, or a social gathering I wasn’t keen on attending, my default response was always ‘yes’.

It took me a while to realize that by constantly saying ‘yes’ to others, I was saying ‘no’ to myself and my own needs. I was living by other people’s expectations and not my own.

The first few times I said ‘no’, it felt uncomfortable. But over time, I noticed a shift. It felt empowering to honor my own needs and set boundaries.

I realized that saying ‘no’ didn’t mean I was a bad person. It meant I was taking care of myself, which in turn made me a better friend, colleague, and overall human being.

Learning to say ‘no’ allowed me to live life on my own terms. It gave me the space and freedom to pursue what truly mattered to me.

So, don’t be afraid to say ‘no’. It might just be the most powerful word in your vocabulary.

3) Embrace imperfection

Perfection is a myth. The reality is, nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes and have flaws. It’s part of being human.

The ancient Japanese art of Kintsugi celebrates this fact. When a piece of pottery breaks, instead of discarding it, the artisans mend it with gold lacquer. The cracks become a part of the piece’s history, making it more beautiful and unique.

In the same way, our imperfections make us who we are. They shape our character and give us depth.

When we strive for perfection and fall short, we often turn to others’ opinions to validate ourselves. But when we embrace our imperfections, we learn to accept ourselves as we are, without needing approval from others.

So instead of hiding your flaws, celebrate them. They make you unique and contribute to your story. Let go of the idea of perfection and start embracing your beautifully imperfect self.

4) Limit your exposure to negativity

Our environment plays a huge role in shaping our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. If we’re constantly surrounded by negativity, it’s easy to absorb those negative vibes and let them influence our decisions and self-perception.

This extends to the people we spend time with, the media we consume, and even the spaces we inhabit.

If you find that certain people or situations are consistently bringing you down and making you question your worth or choices, it might be time to distance yourself. This isn’t about avoiding criticism or shutting out different viewpoints. It’s about creating a healthy mental space where you’re free from harmful negativity.

Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your well-being and choose who and what influences your life. So, limit your exposure to negativity. It’s your life, live it on your terms.

5) Forgive yourself

We all make mistakes. We all have moments of self-doubt, hesitation, and regret. It’s a part of our journey, a part of being human.

Sometimes, we’re our own harshest critics. We berate ourselves for perceived failures, replaying scenarios in our minds and wondering how we could’ve done better.

But here’s the thing: Holding onto past mistakes and regrets doesn’t help us move forward. It only keeps us stuck in a cycle of self-criticism and negativity.

To live life on your own terms, you need to forgive yourself. Understand that it’s okay to make mistakes. See them as learning experiences rather than failures.

Forgiving yourself allows you to let go of the past and focus on the present. It gives you the freedom to be who you truly are, without the weight of guilt or regret holding you back.

So give yourself some grace. You’re doing the best you can with what you have, and that’s enough. Forgive yourself and keep moving forward.

6) Prioritize self-care

For a long time, I saw self-care as a luxury, something that could be put off until everything else on my to-do list was checked off. It wasn’t until I hit a low point, both mentally and physically, that I realized how essential self-care truly is.

Self-care isn’t just about bubble baths and spa days. It’s about taking care of your mental, emotional, and physical health. It’s about making time for activities that replenish your energy, boost your mood, and keep you grounded.

When you prioritize self-care, you’re sending a powerful message to yourself: You matter. Your needs are important. You’re worth taking care of.

This simple act can help you build resilience against the pressure of others’ opinions. When you’re feeling good within yourself, you’re less likely to be swayed by external influences.

So make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine. Your well-being is worth it.

7) Establish clear boundaries

Boundaries are critical when it comes to living life on your own terms. They define what is acceptable to you and what is not, helping you maintain your personal space and well-being.

Whether it’s saying ‘no’ to additional work when you’re already overwhelmed, or choosing not to engage with negative individuals, setting boundaries helps protect your time, energy, and mental health.

Keep in mind that setting boundaries isn’t about being selfish or unkind. It’s about respecting yourself and asking others to do the same.

Remember, you have every right to establish and uphold your boundaries. They’re an important tool in helping you live life on your terms. So don’t shy away from setting them and sticking to them.

8) Believe in yourself

At the end of the day, the most powerful tool in letting go of others’ opinions and living life on your own terms is believing in yourself.

Trust in your abilities, your decisions, and your worth. Know that you are capable, you are deserving, and you are enough just as you are.

When you believe in yourself, no opinion or judgment can shake your confidence or deter you from your path. You’re able to stand tall amidst the noise and stay true to who you are.

So hold onto that belief, nurture it, let it grow. Believe in yourself, always.

Final thoughts: It’s your journey

The journey towards living life on your own terms isn’t always easy. It can be filled with self-doubt, fear, and resistance. But remember, it’s your journey.

It’s about finding what resonates with you, what makes you happy and fulfilled. It’s about creating a life that reflects who you are and what you believe in.

At the end of the day, the opinions that matter most are those that come from within you. They’re the ones that align with your values and aspirations.

Remember the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson: “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

So, let go of the weight of others’ opinions. Embrace your own voice, your own path. Live life on your terms. It’s the most authentic and fulfilling way to live.