8 warning signs you’re in love with the wrong person

Love is a tricky beast. It can make us feel on top of the world one moment, and then questioning everything the next.
Sometimes, we fall for the wrong person and it can be tough to see the signs when we’re deep in it.
But there are telltale signs that you might be in love with the wrong person.
In this article, I’m going to walk you through 8 warning signs that scream ‘wrong person’.
Let’s get started.
1) Constant conflict
Disagreements are a normal part of any relationship. But when you’re with the right person, these conflicts are usually resolved in a healthy way.
If you’re constantly fighting with your partner, it’s a clear sign that something’s not right.
We’re not talking about the occasional spat here and there. We mean constant, recurring arguments that leave you feeling drained and emotionally exhausted.
If you find yourself in this situation, it’s a pretty strong signal that you’re in love with the wrong person. It’s not about who’s right or who’s wrong; it’s about being in a relationship that brings more pain than joy.
Love should feel good most of the time. If it doesn’t, it might be time to reevaluate.
2) Your values don’t align
I’ve been there. I once fell for someone who was charming, intelligent, and incredibly fun to be around. But the more I got to know them, the more I realized our core values were worlds apart.
They were a free spirit, always looking for the next adventure. I, on the other hand, craved stability and routine. They didn’t believe in marriage, while I’d always dreamed of a white wedding.
When your core values clash, the relationship is likely to face serious hurdles down the road. It’s not about changing who you are to fit into their world, or vice versa. It’s about finding someone who complements you and shares your vision for the future.
If your gut is telling you that something doesn’t quite align, it might be a sign you’re in love with the wrong person. Trust me, I’ve been there, and it’s not a fun place to be.
3) You’re always justifying their behavior to others
When you’re in love with the right person, their actions speak for themselves. You don’t need to constantly explain or justify their behavior to your friends and family.
However, people often make excuses for their partner’s negative behavior when they’re in a dysfunctional relationship. This is usually a defense mechanism to avoid facing the reality that the relationship isn’t healthy.
If you find yourself always on the defensive, it might be a red flag that you’re in love with the wrong person. Love should make you proud, not apologetic.
4) You feel insecure
Love is supposed to make you feel secure, cherished, and valued. If you’re constantly feeling insecure or anxious in your relationship, it’s a clear sign something is off.
When we’re with the right person, they’ll make us feel safe and loved. They’ll build us up, not tear us down.
But if you’re always doubting their feelings for you, or if you’re worried about their loyalty, it could mean you’re in love with the wrong person.
You deserve a relationship that brings out the best in you. If you’re feeling insecure more often than not, it may be time to reassess.
5) You’re not yourself around them
This one hits close to home for many of us. When you’re in love, you should feel free to be your true self. Your quirks, your passions, your dreams – they should all be celebrated by your partner.
But if you’re constantly feeling the need to tone down your personality, hide your true feelings or change who you are to please them, it’s a heartbreaking sign that you might be in love with the wrong person.
The right person will love you for who you truly are. They won’t make you feel like you have to wear a mask or suppress your authentic self.
Because at the end of the day, love should be about acceptance, not transformation.
6) There’s more sadness than joy
I remember a time when I would count the days between bouts of happiness in my relationship. More often than not, I found myself unhappy, frustrated, and emotionally drained.
Psychology tells us that a healthy relationship should bring more joy than sadness. Yes, every relationship has its ups and downs, but the overall balance should lean towards positivity.
If you’re constantly unhappy or emotionally exhausted, it’s a clear sign that something isn’t right. You should feel uplifted by your partner’s presence, not weighed down.
Love isn’t always easy, but it shouldn’t be a constant uphill battle either.
7) You’re constantly hoping they’ll change
Wishing for someone to change is a tricky road to walk down. Inherent changes seldom happen, and they cannot be forced.
If you’re in love with the potential of what your partner could be rather than who they currently are, it’s a clear sign that you might be in love with the wrong person.
The right person for you will be someone whose current qualities, habits, and life views align with yours. While growth and evolution are part of any relationship, you shouldn’t hinge your happiness on the hope of future change.
Love is about accepting someone for who they are today, not who you hope they could become tomorrow.
8) Your intuition is telling you something’s wrong
Never underestimate the power of your gut instinct. It’s your body’s own built-in alarm system. If you have a persistent feeling that something isn’t right, don’t ignore it.
Your intuition is an accumulation of your subconscious experiences and knowledge. If it’s signaling that you might be in love with the wrong person, pay attention.
The right relationship will feel right. Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.
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