Have you ever looked around and realized your energy was being drained by people who were supposed to lift you up?

I’ve been there more times than I’d like to admit.

Between juggling my writing deadlines and making sure my son has a balanced life, I’ve learned how precious genuine friendships can be.

They’re not just feel-good connections.

They shape who we are.

Consistent social stress can contribute to issues like anxiety and depression.

I refuse to let that happen, and I don’t want it to happen to you either.

We all deserve better.

So, let’s talk about eight types of people who rarely deserve a spot in your life.

1. The Chronic Critic

You’ve met this person.

They never have a kind word.

They pick apart everything you do.

Constant negative feedback can lower self-esteem and discourage personal growth.

I experienced this firsthand when I started working on my first big writing project.

A so-called friend kept saying, “That angle is too simple,” or “Nobody will care about your story.”

It took me weeks to shake off their words and trust my instincts again.

It might seem like they’re just trying to “help,” but genuine help comes with constructive feedback.

Mean-spirited remarks aren’t supportive.

We can learn from criticism, but we don’t need to subject ourselves to emotional punching bags.

2. The Endless Taker

This person always seems to need something.

Their texts light up your phone when they’re short on cash, struggling with errands, or craving attention.

But when you call them with a problem?

Suddenly, they disappear.

Reciprocal friendships—where both parties offer emotional support—boost daily well-being.

I see this play out every day as a mom.

When I have a hectic week, genuine friends help me brainstorm strategies for managing my schedule.

Endless takers don’t.

They only check in when they need a babysitter or a favor.

That’s not friendship.

It’s one-sided labor.

3. The Drama Magnet

Everything is a crisis.

They thrive on chaos, whether it’s gossip, feuds, or elaborate sagas about who did what.

I remember a time when I let one of these drama magnets crash on my couch for a week.

She insisted her entire world was burning down.

By day three, I realized she had exaggerated most of her troubles.

She just liked living in a storm.

That mental exhaustion seeps into your own life.

Before you know it, you’re carrying stress that’s not even yours.

Here’s what I watch for:

• They often call with urgent news or gossip.
• They rarely ask how you’re doing or let you speak.
• They get frustrated if you don’t immediately take their side in every issue.

According to the APA, exposure to high-conflict relationships can spike your stress hormone levels.

That leads to poor health outcomes over time.

We can all handle a friend in genuine crisis, but if it’s never-ending and orchestrated, watch out.

4. The Envious Underminer

You have a small win, and they roll their eyes.

You feel proud of a new job opportunity, and they respond with half-hearted congratulations.

I used to think subtle envy was harmless.

Then I started to notice how my envious friend always found a way to mention my flaws.

When I told her I got a raise, she said, “Well, I guess they’re being generous these days.”

It felt like a dagger to my confidence.

We deserve people who celebrate our success.

People who share each other’s positive milestones have stronger emotional bonds and better psychological resilience.

Underminers don’t celebrate anything that doesn’t involve them.

That attitude isn’t worth keeping around.

5. The Unreliable Flake

Ever had a day packed with obligations, and the one piece of fun was meeting a friend for coffee?

Then they text, “Sorry, something came up,” moments before you’re supposed to meet.

I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve rearranged my schedule for people who made me wait around.

Life happens.

But when it’s a pattern, it shows a lack of respect for your time.

I’m not claiming to have a perfect formula, but I do know what it’s like to juggle a million things at once.

Real friends honor each other’s commitments.

If they can’t, they communicate early and honestly.

Reliable social support can be a strong buffer against stress-related health issues.

Flakiness does the opposite.

It piles more frustration on top of your already busy life.

6. The Manipulator

They’re charming at first.

They know exactly what to say to win your trust.

But their real goal is control—over how you spend your time, who you hang out with, or even what you think.

I had a friend who always twisted my words when I disagreed with her.

She’d say, “So you’re against me now?” or “I guess I’m the villain.”

It made me question my own perspective.

As Glennon Doyle once said, “The truest, most beautiful life never promises to be an easy one.”

We can’t always avoid conflict, but we shouldn’t put up with someone who manipulates our emotions to keep us on a leash.

That’s not love or friendship.

It’s sabotage.

7. The Gossip

They love discussing everyone else’s personal affairs.

They claim it’s harmless talk.

But here’s the kicker.

If they’re spilling everyone’s secrets to you, they’re spilling yours to everyone else.

I’m raising my son to respect people’s boundaries and privacy.

He knows gossiping only leads to mistrust.

When you maintain friendships with gossips, you become complicit in their cycle of rumor-spreading.

Relationships rooted in authenticity and mutual respect are linked to higher levels of happiness.

Gossip is the opposite of authenticity.

You’re better off walking away than fueling that toxic loop.

8. The Persistently Negative

We all have bad days.

But some people choose to see the dark side of every single situation.

They’re usually the first to complain and the last to acknowledge anything good.

Prolonged negativity in close social circles can increase depression rates, even among those who consider themselves mentally resilient.

When I was going through a tough time at work, I turned to a friend who constantly complained about her own life.

Big mistake.

Instead of feeling supported, I felt worse.

Her negativity overshadowed any comfort she tried to offer.

If someone’s gloom is chronic and they refuse to seek solutions, you don’t have to hold their hand indefinitely.

Balancing Empathy With Boundaries

I’m learning as I go, just like you.

Every day, I tell my son that kindness matters.

But I also remind him that kindness includes self-respect.

According to James Clear, small daily decisions shape our environment and, by extension, our habits.

If your environment is full of toxic people, it’s harder to maintain healthy emotional patterns.

I’ve had to let go of people who drained me or disrespected my boundaries.

It’s never easy.

But it’s worth it.

I can’t show up as a good mom or a focused writer when I’m surrounded by negativity.

Final Thoughts

You’re allowed to choose who gets access to your energy.

Life is too short to carry someone else’s emotional baggage, especially when they’re not willing to share yours.

Removing toxic people isn’t selfish.

It’s self-preservation.

And it opens up space for healthier, more supportive connections.

If any of these eight types of people are lingering in your life, consider how they affect your peace of mind.

You have the power to set limits or walk away.

Your well-being—and your true friends—will thank you.