8 traits of people who don’t have many friends but aren’t lonely, according to psychology

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | November 24, 2024, 2:42 pm

There’s a common misconception that equates having fewer friends to feeling lonely. But, let me tell you, that’s not always the case.

Psychology suggests that having a smaller social circle doesn’t necessarily mean you’re destined for loneliness. In fact, some people prefer it that way and they’re perfectly happy with their choice.

So, who are these individuals who keep their friend list short, yet don’t feel the sting of loneliness?

In this piece, we’ll explore the 8 distinct traits that set them apart. So, buckle up and get ready for some fascinating insights into the minds of these unique individuals.

1) They cherish solitude

Contrary to popular belief, enjoying alone time doesn’t equate to loneliness. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.

People who don’t have many friends but aren’t lonely, they relish their solitude. They see it as a chance to unwind, recharge and indulge in activities they love.

It’s not that they despise social interactions or company. Rather, they just value their own company and the peace that comes with solitude. They’re the ones who can happily spend a weekend alone with a good book or a personal project.

Psychology suggests that these individuals are often introverts who gain energy from being alone. And it’s important to remember that being introverted is not a flaw, it’s just a different way of experiencing the world.

So, no, enjoying your own company doesn’t make you weird or antisocial. It simply means you have a healthy relationship with yourself.

2) They’re selective, not antisocial

Once upon a time, I was labeled the ‘antisocial one’ in my group. Why? Because I didn’t jump at every social invitation that came my way.

But the fact is, I’m not antisocial – I’m selective. I prefer quality over quantity when it comes to friendships. And guess what? So do many others who don’t have a big circle of friends.

These individuals are known to be picky about who they let into their lives. They’d rather have a few close, meaningful relationships than a crowd of acquaintances.

They spend time building deep connections with the few people they choose to befriend. These are the friends they can rely on, share their thoughts with, and be their true selves around.

For them (and for me), it’s not about being antisocial but about being selective. And this selectivity often leads to more rewarding relationships and less loneliness.

3) They are self-sufficient

People who have fewer friends and don’t feel lonely often exhibit self-sufficiency. They don’t rely on others for their happiness or fulfillment – they seek it within themselves.

Scientifically speaking, a study found that highly intelligent individuals tend to be happier when they spend more time alone, compared to being around people. This backs up their trait of self-sufficiency.

These individuals find joy in their pursuits, whether it’s a hobby, a career path, or self-improvement. They set personal goals and work towards achieving them. This self-driven attitude serves as a constant source of motivation, leaving little room for feelings of loneliness.

So, while they may not have a large crowd around them, they’re too busy striving for their ambitions to feel alone.

4) They value their independence

Independence is a trait that’s deeply ingrained in people who have fewer friends but aren’t lonely.

These individuals thrive on the freedom to make their own choices and live life on their own terms. They enjoy the liberty to pursue their passions, make their own decisions, and craft their own schedules without having to consider a multitude of social commitments.

This independence can also extend to their emotional well-being. They’re often able to handle emotional highs and lows independently, without needing constant reassurance or support from a large group of friends.

While others might see this as a sign of isolation, these individuals see it as empowering. Their independence allows them to lead fulfilling lives, devoid of any feelings of loneliness.

5) They treasure meaningful connections

In a world where social media followers can often be mistaken for friends, people with fewer friends but who aren’t lonely understand the value of meaningful connections.

It’s not about the number of friends they have, but the depth and quality of the relationships they maintain. They treasure genuine interactions and shared experiences that create bonds stronger than any number could suggest.

These individuals look for authenticity in their friendships. The kind of friendships where silence is comfortable, understanding is mutual, and support is unconditional.

This approach to relationships provides them with a strong emotional support system, even if it’s smaller in size. The deep connections they cultivate keep loneliness at bay, proving that sometimes less is indeed more.

6) They appreciate their own company

I remember sitting by myself in a coffee shop on a lazy Sunday afternoon. As I sipped my coffee and read my book, I noticed the shop buzzing with groups of friends, laughing and chatting away. For a moment, I wondered if I was missing out.

But then, I realized, I was enjoying my solitude. I was content with my book, my coffee, and my thoughts. Just like many who have fewer friends but aren’t lonely, I’ve learned to appreciate my own company.

These individuals don’t need constant social interaction to feel satisfied. They find comfort and joy in their thoughts, hobbies, or simply in the quiet moments they spend alone.

This ability to be alone without feeling lonely is a powerful one. It speaks of self-acceptance and contentment that runs deeper than any social circle could offer.

7) They’re comfortable with who they are

One of the most distinctive traits of people who don’t have many friends but aren’t lonely is their comfort in their own skin.

These individuals have a solid sense of self. They understand their strengths, acknowledge their weaknesses, and accept themselves as they are.

Their self-worth isn’t tied to the number of friends they have or how popular they are. Instead, it comes from within, from their self-respect and self-love.

This comfort with who they are makes them immune to the societal pressure of having a large group of friends. They don’t feel the need to fit in because they’re perfectly content standing out.

This level of self-assurance and acceptance keeps feelings of loneliness at bay, making them feel complete in their own company.

8) They understand the difference between alone and lonely

The most crucial thing to remember about people who don’t have many friends but aren’t lonely is that they understand the difference between being alone and being lonely.

Being alone is a physical state, a lack of company. Being lonely, on the other hand, is an emotional state, a feeling of isolation, even in the presence of others.

These individuals have learned to embrace solitude without succumbing to loneliness. They view alone time as an opportunity for personal growth, introspection, and rejuvenation rather than a cause for concern or sadness.

This understanding frees them from societal norms about friendship quantity and allows them to lead fulfilling lives on their own terms. They’ve mastered the art of being alone without being lonely, and that’s what makes them truly unique.