8 traits of people who are better off staying single, according to psychology

Avatar by Lachlan Brown | November 24, 2024, 2:14 pm

There’s a vast difference between needing to be in a relationship and being content with being single.

This distinction often comes down to certain psychological traits. Some people are just wired to be better off alone, cherishing their solo time and personal space.

No, it’s not about being anti-social or unable to find love. It’s about recognizing their unique traits and being comfortable with their own company.

Let’s dive in and explore these characteristics of people who might just be better off staying single.

1) They value their independence

There’s nothing quite like the freedom of being single.

For some people, maintaining their independence is a top priority. They don’t just enjoy their own company; they thrive on it.

Being single allows them to dictate their own schedule, make decisions without having to consider another person’s preferences, and simply enjoy the pleasure of solitude.

Psychology suggests that people who deeply value their independence might find more satisfaction in single life than in a relationship.

While relationships can offer many benefits, they also require compromises. For those who find personal autonomy to be highly important, these compromises might be a price too high to pay.

2) They’re self-reliant

Let me tell you a little story about my friend, Sam.

Sam has always been the type who could handle any situation life threw at him. He was always the one who solved his own problems, fixed his own car, and even built his own furniture.

For Sam, this sense of self-reliance was deeply ingrained. It wasn’t that he didn’t appreciate help when it was needed; he was just comfortable handling things on his own.

When it came to relationships, Sam found that his self-reliance often became a sticking point. His partners would often feel excluded or unnecessary because Sam was so capable of taking care of everything himself.

Eventually, Sam came to realize that his self-reliance wasn’t a flaw—it was just part of who he was. And for him, being single was a better fit.

Psychology tells us that self-reliant people like Sam often feel more comfortable being single. They enjoy the freedom to handle things in their own way without having to consider someone else’s input or feelings.

3) They enjoy solitude

Solitude isn’t for everyone. Some people find the silence deafening, while others find it incredibly peaceful.

For those who love solitude, being single may be their best bet. Having the ability to retreat into your own space, undisturbed, can be a source of comfort and rejuvenation.

This isn’t to say that they are recluses or antisocial. Quite the opposite, in fact. Many such individuals are introverts who recharge their mental and emotional batteries by spending time alone.

A study by Bella DePaulo, a psychologist at the University of California, Santa Barbara, found that people who are single are more likely to experience personal growth and development than those in relationships.

This growth often comes from the ability to spend time in solitude, reflecting on one’s thoughts and feelings without distraction or the need to compromise.

4) They’re comfortable with who they are

Being single requires a certain level of self-acceptance and self-love. Those who are better off single are often very comfortable in their own skin. They know who they are, what they want, and they don’t feel the need to change or compromise to fit into someone else’s ideal.

These individuals don’t rely on a partner to validate their worth or define their identity. Instead, they draw their sense of self from their own accomplishments, passions, and personal growth.

Being comfortable with yourself also means being able to handle loneliness. It’s not that single people never feel lonely, but they have learnt to manage these feelings without panicking or rushing into an unsuitable relationship.

5) They cherish their friendships

When you’re single, friendships often take on a more significant role in your life.

People who are better off single often have deep, meaningful friendships that provide them with companionship, emotional support, and a sense of belonging.

These individuals understand that romantic relationships aren’t the only type of relationships that can offer love and fulfillment. Friendships can be just as enriching, if not more so.

They invest time and effort into nurturing these relationships, cherishing the bond they share with their friends. They celebrate the joys, weather the storms, and navigate the challenges of life together.

6) They prioritize personal growth

Years ago, I came to a crossroads in my life. I had to choose between a relationship and an opportunity to move abroad for a career advancement.

It was a tough choice, but in the end, I chose the latter. It wasn’t because I didn’t care about the relationship, but because I knew that this was a unique chance for me to grow personally and professionally.

People who are better off single often prioritize personal growth. They understand that being single gives them the freedom to explore opportunities that might be challenging to pursue in a relationship.

Whether it’s moving for a job, going back to school, or simply taking the time to explore their passions, these individuals choose their personal growth over being in a relationship.

Personal growth can be a powerful motivator and source of fulfillment. If you’re someone who values personal development and is willing to make significant life changes to achieve it, being single might be the right choice for you.

7) They embrace change

Change can be scary for some people. But for others, it’s an exciting part of life.

Those who are better off staying single often embrace change with open arms. They thrive on the unpredictability of life and see every change as an opportunity for growth and learning.

Being single allows them the flexibility to adapt to changes without having to consider how it will affect a partner. It provides them with the freedom to take risks, try new things, and live life on their own terms.

8) They don’t fear being alone

The true mark of someone who is better off single is that they do not fear being alone. They understand that being alone does not mean being lonely.

They enjoy their own company, find pleasure in their own thoughts, and are content with their own presence. They see solitude not as a condition to be feared, but as an opportunity for self-reflection, relaxation, and personal growth.

Final thoughts: It’s about happiness

When we delve into the complexities of human relationships and individual preferences, we often come across a simple, yet profound truth – it’s all about happiness.

The pursuit of happiness is an individual journey. For some, it lies in sharing their life with a partner. For others, it’s found in the solitude and independence of being single.

Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi emphasizes this in his theory of “flow,” where people are happiest when they are in a state of complete immersion in an activity they love. This state can be achieved just as effectively, if not more so, when one is single.

And being single doesn’t mean one is isolated or lonely. It simply means that they have found contentment and joy in their own company, their passions, and their personal growth.

So, whether you find these traits align with you or not, the key takeaway here is this: Know yourself. Understand what brings you joy. Pursue what makes you happiest. Because at the end of the day, it’s your journey and your life to live.

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