8 subtle body language gestures that instantly make you more likable

Tina Fey by Tina Fey | November 8, 2024, 3:12 pm

There’s a huge difference between being liked and being overlooked.

The difference is all in the details. It’s not just about what you say, but how you say it, and more importantly, how you show it.

Body language is a subtle yet powerful tool in making people warm up to you. And no, it doesn’t involve any mind games or manipulation.

It’s all about sending positive signals that make people feel comfortable and valued around you.

In this article, I’m going to share with you 8 understated body language gestures that can instantly make you more likable.

1) The power of a genuine smile

There’s hardly anything as welcoming as a genuine smile.

In the world of nonverbal communication, nothing screams likability more than a warm, sincere smile. It’s the universal sign of friendliness and approachability.

A genuine smile isn’t just about moving your lips upwards. It involves your whole face, especially your eyes. It’s what psychologists call a Duchenne smile.

Research has shown that people who often smile are perceived as more likable and trustworthy. They’re seen as more relaxed, confident, and in control.

But remember, it has to be genuine. Forced or fake smiles can have the opposite effect. They can make you come off as insincere or even manipulative.

So next time you’re interacting with someone, flash them a big, genuine smile. It might just make their day—and yours too!

2) Nodding at the right moments

Nodding is a simple yet effective way to show someone that you’re attentive and interested in what they’re saying.

I remember a time when I was at a networking event. I was having a conversation with a potential client, and I could tell she was passionate about her work. As she was talking, I found myself naturally nodding along, showing her that I was engaged and understood what she was saying.

Later, she mentioned how much she appreciated our conversation. She said she felt heard and understood, which made her feel more comfortable with me.

This is the power of nodding at the right moments. It’s a subtle gesture, but it can have a huge impact on how likable you come across to others.

So the next time you’re in a conversation, make sure to nod at the right moments. It can make the person you’re talking to feel valued and heard. And that can go a long way in making you more likable.

3) Mirroring body language

Mirroring is when you subtly mimic the body language of the person you’re interacting with. It could be their posture, hand gestures, or facial expressions.

This isn’t about mimicking every single move they make, which could come off as creepy. Instead, it’s about subtly reflecting back their body language in a natural and unforced way.

What’s remarkable about this gesture is that it can help build rapport and establish a connection with the other person. It makes them feel understood and comfortable around you.

Psychologists have found that people who mirror each other’s body language during a conversation often feel more positively towards each other. This is because mirroring can foster a sense of empathy and understanding.

So the next time you’re in a social situation, try subtly mirroring the other person’s body language. You might be surprised at how much more likable it makes you.

4) Open body language

Having an open body language is like rolling out a welcome mat for others. It’s a nonverbal way of saying, “I’m open, approachable, and friendly.”

When you’re interacting with others, avoid crossing your arms or legs. These are defensive postures that can signal discomfort or disinterest.

Instead, keep your body open. Face the other person directly, maintain eye contact, and keep your arms and legs uncrossed. This shows that you’re receptive and interested in the conversation.

Also, try to take up a little more space. This doesn’t mean you should sprawl out and invade other people’s personal space. Rather, it’s about standing or sitting tall and confident.

Open body language can make you appear more likable because it sends a message of trustworthiness and positivity. So next time you’re in a social setting, remember to keep your body language open and welcoming.

5) Warm and firm handshakes

A handshake might seem like a small thing, but it can have a big impact on how people perceive you.

A warm and firm handshake can convey trust, friendliness, and respect. It’s one of the first impressions you make on someone, so it’s crucial to get it right.

A limp or weak handshake can give off the impression that you’re not confident or not fully present in the interaction. On the other hand, a too strong handshake can come off as aggressive.

Finding the right balance for your handshake can be a powerful tool in making you more likable. It’s about showing respect and warmth to the other person, making them feel appreciated and valued.

So the next time you meet someone new, remember to give them a warm and firm handshake. It can make a world of difference in how they perceive you.

6) Leaning in during conversations

Leaning in during a conversation is a subtle gesture that shows you’re engaged and interested in what the other person has to say.

There was a time when I was going through a difficult phase and needed someone to talk to. I remember sitting down with a friend, pouring out my heart to her. As I started sharing, I noticed that she was leaning in, her eyes focused on me. That simple act made me feel valued and heard.

Leaning in conveys that you’re fully present in the conversation and that you genuinely care about the other person’s thoughts and feelings. This can help you build trust and rapport with them.

But remember, it’s important to respect personal space. Leaning in doesn’t mean getting too close for comfort.

So the next time you’re engrossed in a conversation, remember to lean in subtly. It can make the other person feel special and cared for, instantly making you more likable.

7) Maintaining good eye contact

Eye contact is a powerful tool in non-verbal communication. It shows that you’re attentive, interested, and engaged in the conversation.

When you maintain good eye contact with someone, it lets them know that you value their thoughts and ideas. It also shows that you’re confident and trustworthy.

On the flip side, frequently breaking eye contact or avoiding it altogether can give the impression that you’re disinterested, nervous, or even dishonest.

Of course, there’s a balance to be struck. Staring too intently can make others uncomfortable. The key is to maintain natural and relaxed eye contact.

So next time you’re interacting with someone, remember to make good eye contact. It’s a simple and effective way to make yourself more likable.

8) Using expressive gestures

Expressive gestures can bring life to your conversations and make you more likable.

When you talk with your hands or use other expressive gestures, you show enthusiasm and passion. This can make your stories and ideas more engaging and memorable.

But remember, there’s a fine line between being expressive and being overly dramatic. The key is to use gestures that feel natural and match the tone of your conversation.

Expressive gestures can make you seem more dynamic, approachable, and interesting. They can draw people in and make them more interested in what you have to say.

So go ahead and let your hands do some of the talking. It could make all the difference in how likable you come across.

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