8 signs you’re becoming the person you were meant to be, according to psychology

Avatar by Lachlan Brown | June 11, 2024, 9:30 pm

There’s a notable distinction between who we are and who we’re meant to be.

Understanding this difference can be a bit tricky, and it often feels like a constant tug of war between our present selves and our potential.

As Lachlan Brown, founder of Hack Spirit and an expert in mindfulness and Buddhism, I’ve spent a lot of time studying this concept. And what I’ve discovered is that there are certain signs, backed by psychology, which point out that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be.

Here are eight signs to look out for. This is not about trying to mold yourself into someone else’s image but about realizing your authentic self. 

Let’s get started. 

1) Embracing change

Change can be scary. It pushes us out of our comfort zones and into the unknown. But it’s through change that growth occurs.

One of the first signs that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be is when you start embracing change rather than resisting it.

According to psychology, people who are in tune with their authentic selves are more open to change. They understand that life is a constant process of evolution, and they’re willing to adapt and grow with it.

This doesn’t mean they blindly follow every new trend or idea. Instead, they mindfully assess changes and decide whether they align with their true selves.

If you find yourself more open to changes, whether big or small, it’s a good sign you’re on the right track. Remember, it’s not about being swept up in the current of life but about mindfully navigating your journey.

This acceptance of change is a sign of personal growth and a step towards becoming who you truly are meant to be.

2) Cultivating mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of being fully present in the moment. It’s about acknowledging and accepting your feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations without judgment.

As someone who has spent years studying and practicing mindfulness, I’ve found that it’s a clear indicator of personal growth.

When you begin to cultivate mindfulness, you’re not just living life on autopilot anymore. You’re fully engaged in every moment, experiencing life as it is rather than how you want it to be.

Thich Nhat Hanh, a renowned Buddhist monk, once said, “The present moment is the only moment available to us, and it is the door to all moments.”

Indeed, by being in the present, you’re able to truly connect with yourself and others around you. You become more aware of your actions and thoughts.

This increased awareness often leads to a deeper understanding of oneself. And with this understanding comes closer alignment with who you’re meant to be.

3) Letting go of attachments

In Buddhism, attachment is seen as the root of all suffering. It’s the clinging to people, possessions, or even ideas that often leaves us feeling stuck or unsatisfied.

One clear sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be is when you start to let go of these attachments.

This doesn’t mean cutting off relationships or giving up your belongings. Rather, it’s about understanding the impermanent nature of everything in life and not allowing these things to define or control you.

When you start to let go, you make room for growth and transformation. You free yourself from the expectations and pressures that may have been holding you back.

It’s a challenging process, no doubt. But it’s also one of the most liberating experiences you can have.

4) Living intentionally

Living intentionally is all about making conscious decisions rather than just going through the motions. It’s a key component of mindfulness.

One clear sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be is when you start making more mindful decisions about how you spend your time, who you spend it with, and even what thoughts you allow to occupy your mind.

Instead of being swayed by external pressures or fleeting desires, you start aligning your choices with your core values and long-term goals.

This doesn’t mean every moment has to be filled with purposeful action. Sometimes, living intentionally can be as simple as choosing to sit quietly and enjoy a cup of tea without distractions.

Living intentionally, however, isn’t always easy. It requires honesty with oneself and the courage to make tough choices. But it’s through these mindful decisions that we move closer to our true selves.

5) Diminishing ego

Ego, in its most basic definition, is our sense of self-importance. It’s often the driving force behind our need for recognition, validation, and control.

Yet, as you start becoming the person you were meant to be, you’ll notice a shift. Your ego starts to diminish, and you begin to understand that life isn’t all about you. You start focusing on being more selfless and understanding.

In my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego, I delve into this concept deeply. I discuss how minimizing the ego is key to living a fulfilled life according to Buddhist principles.

When you allow your ego to take a backseat, you open yourself up to genuine connections, empathy, and the ability to learn from others.

If you’re noticing that your ego isn’t as loud as it used to be, congratulate yourself. It’s a significant leap forward in your journey towards authenticity and becoming the person you were meant to be.

6) Embracing imperfection

Perfection is a myth. Yet, we often hold ourselves to unrealistic standards, causing unnecessary stress and self-doubt.

One of the signs that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be is when you start embracing your imperfections.

Buddhist teachings tell us that life is imperfect and full of suffering. But it’s through accepting these imperfections and difficulties that we find true happiness and wisdom.

Similarly, mindfulness teaches us to observe our flaws without judgment. It encourages us to accept ourselves as we are, not as we think we should be.

Embracing imperfection doesn’t mean settling for less. Instead, it’s about acknowledging our shortcomings and using them as stepping stones for personal growth.

It’s raw, it’s honest, and it’s far from easy. But if you find yourself accepting your imperfections rather than fighting them, it’s a sure sign you’re on the path to becoming your true self.

7) Prioritizing inner peace

Inner peace is a state of being mentally and spiritually at peace, with enough knowledge and understanding to keep oneself strong during times of stress.

One sure sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be is when you start prioritizing your inner peace over external validation.

Buddhist wisdom tells us that true peace comes from within, not from the outside world. It’s about finding contentment in our own thoughts and actions, rather than seeking approval or praise from others.

As the famous Buddhist monk Dalai Lama once said, “We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.”

Prioritizing inner peace is not about avoiding challenges or conflicts. Instead, it’s about facing them with a calm and peaceful mind.

It takes honesty and courage to shift the focus inward. But if you find yourself prioritizing inner peace more than before, take it as a sign that you’re becoming more aligned with your true self.

8) Welcoming discomfort

It might sound counterintuitive, but welcoming discomfort is a clear sign that you’re becoming the person you were meant to be.

Mindfulness teaches us to observe our feelings, including discomfort, without reacting or trying to change them. It’s about acknowledging these feelings, understanding their origin, and allowing them to exist without judgment.

When you start welcoming discomfort instead of avoiding it, you gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your emotions. This understanding helps you respond more mindfully to life’s challenges, rather than reacting out of fear or habit.

Discomfort is often a sign of growth. It means you’re pushing your boundaries and stepping out of your comfort zone.

If you find yourself welcoming discomfort instead of running from it, celebrate this progress. It’s a testament to your personal growth and a step closer to becoming the person you were truly meant to be.


Becoming the person you were meant to be isn’t a destination, but a journey. It’s about embracing change, letting go of attachments, living intentionally, and welcoming discomfort. It’s about finding inner peace amidst the chaos and seeing the beauty of imperfection.

These signs are not a checklist but rather guideposts on your journey towards self-discovery and growth. Remember, everyone’s journey is unique, and these signs may manifest differently for each individual.

If you’d like to delve deeper into this journey of self-discovery and living a life with maximum impact and minimum ego, I invite you to read my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How To Live With Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego. It’s a comprehensive guide that brings together Buddhist wisdom and practical mindfulness techniques to help you navigate your path towards authenticity.

Embrace your journey with an open heart and open mind. After all, becoming the person you were meant to be is the most fulfilling adventure of all.

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