There’s a thin line between a partner being busy and one who’s just not all in.

It’s all about the actions, the little things that sometimes we choose to ignore. A partner who’s not fully committed might not be as obvious as you’d think.

In a relationship, it’s important to know where you stand. Are you both rowing the boat in the same direction or is one of you just along for the ride?

Here are eight signs that might suggest your partner isn’t completely committed to your relationship. These signs are subtle, but once you’re aware of them, they’ll make all the difference.

1) They’re often unavailable

In relationships, it’s the little things that matter. And one of those is availability.

We all have busy lives, with work, friends, and personal obligations. But when you’re committed to someone, you make time for them. You prioritize them.

If your partner is often unavailable, it could be a sign that they’re not fully invested in your relationship.

Unavailability can take many forms. Maybe they’re always working late or constantly hanging out with friends. Or perhaps they’re always too tired or busy for couple activities.

Remember, where a person spends their time shows what they value most. If they’re not spending it with you, it could be a sign of lack of commitment.

Take note but don’t jump to conclusions. Communication is key. Talk to them about it and see how they respond. Their reaction could tell you a lot about their level of commitment.

2) They dodge serious conversations

We’ve all been there. I remember that one time I tried to talk to my partner about our future. You know, the usual stuff – plans, dreams, where we saw ourselves in a few years. But every time I brought it up, they seemed uncomfortable and quickly changed the subject.

And it wasn’t just about our future together. Any serious topic seemed to scare them away. Questions about their feelings, their thoughts on commitment, or their views on marriage were met with vague responses or obvious diversions.

Looking back, it was a clear sign that they weren’t fully committed to our relationship. A person who is truly invested in you won’t shy away from these discussions. They’ll be open and even eager to plan a future with you.

If your partner consistently avoids serious conversations, it could be a sign that they’re not fully committed to your relationship. It’s worth having a straightforward talk about it. Ask them why they aren’t comfortable discussing these topics. Their answer might give you the clarity you’re looking for.

3) They don’t involve you in their plans

It’s common for couples who are committed to each other to make plans together. This doesn’t mean that you have to do everything together, of course. Everyone needs some personal space and time. However, if your partner is making big decisions or plans without involving you, it could be a sign that they’re not fully committed.

Studies show that inclusivity is a key factor in a strong relationship. When people see their future with their partner, they naturally want to include them in their plans and decisions.

So if your partner is planning vacations, making major purchases, or even deciding on weekend activities without considering you, it could be an indication that they’re not viewing you as part of their future. It’s important to address this issue and express how it makes you feel. Open communication is always the best way forward.

4) They’re secretive about their life

Transparency is a cornerstone of any strong relationship. We share our lives with our partners, opening up about our days, our worries, our hopes, and our dreams.

If your partner is consistently secretive or vague about their life, it could be a sign that they’re not fully committed to the relationship. Maybe they avoid sharing details about their friends, their work, or their past. Maybe they’re always on their phone, but never share what they’re looking at or who they’re talking to.

This kind of secrecy can create a divide in your relationship. It can make you feel like an outsider rather than an integral part of their life. If you notice this behavior in your partner, it’s important to talk about it. Let them know how it makes you feel and ask for more transparency. Their response might provide a clearer picture of their commitment to the relationship.

5) They don’t express love or affection often

Love and affection are the fuel that keeps a relationship running. It’s what makes us feel cherished, wanted, and valued by our partners. It’s not always about grand gestures or expensive gifts. Often, it’s the little things: a warm hug, a loving text, a gentle touch.

If your partner rarely expresses love or shows affection, it can leave you feeling disconnected or unappreciated. You might start to question their feelings for you, and rightly so. A committed partner will want to make you feel loved and valued.

Remember, everyone has different ways of expressing love. Some people are more verbal, others show it through acts of service. But if your partner isn’t showing love in any form, it could be a sign that they’re not fully committed to the relationship.

It’s important to communicate your needs to your partner. Let them know how their lack of affection makes you feel. A committed partner will value your feelings and make an effort to show their love in ways that resonate with you.

6) They show a lack of interest in your life

I remember a time when I was excited about a big project at work. It was something I had poured my heart and soul into, and I couldn’t wait to share it with my partner. But when I did, they just nodded and quickly changed the subject.

It was a small moment, but it hurt. It felt like they didn’t care about my passions or what was important to me.

In a committed relationship, both partners take an interest in each other’s lives. They ask about each other’s day, celebrate each other’s achievements, and provide support during tough times.

If your partner rarely asks about your life or shows little interest in what’s important to you, it could be a sign that they’re not fully committed to the relationship. A healthy relationship involves mutual interest and support. If that’s lacking, it might be time for a serious conversation about your future together.

7) They’re reluctant to introduce you to their family and friends

Meeting a partner’s family and friends is a significant step in a relationship. It’s often a sign that they see a future with you and want to integrate you into their life.

If your partner is reluctant to introduce you to their family or close friends, it could be a sign that they’re not fully committed. Perhaps they’re keeping their relationship options open, or they’re not sure if the relationship has long-term potential.

It’s worth having an open discussion about this. Express your concern and see how they respond. Remember, good communication is essential in resolving any issue in a relationship.

8) They don’t talk about the future with you

Talking about the future is a key part of any committed relationship. It shows that both partners see each other in their lives long term.

If your partner avoids discussing the future or makes vague, non-committal statements when the topic comes up, it can be a clear sign they’re not fully committed to the relationship.

This doesn’t just mean big things like marriage or kids, but also smaller plans like travel or even what to do over the holidays. If they’re hesitant to commit to future plans, it might be a sign they’re hesitant to commit to you.

Final thoughts: It’s about communication and understanding

Recognizing the signals of a partner’s lack of commitment is, undoubtedly, an emotionally challenging task. But it’s crucial in understanding the dynamics of your relationship.

The signs might not always be crystal clear, and that’s where open communication comes into play. If you’re sensing these signs, initiate a conversation with your partner. Express your feelings, your fears, and your expectations.

Remember that everyone has their own pace when it comes to commitment. It’s important to respect that and not rush things. However, if you consistently feel undervalued or neglected, it might be time to reconsider the relationship.

Robert A. Heinlein once said, “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” If you find that your partner’s happiness doesn’t include you or vice versa, it might be a sign that the commitment isn’t mutual.

In the end, every relationship is unique and complex in its own way. It takes time, patience, and mutual effort to make it work. And sometimes, recognizing the lack of commitment can be the first step towards understanding what you truly need from a relationship.