8 signs that someone is not a good person according to psychology

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | November 16, 2024, 7:00 pm

There’s a thin line between genuine kindness and masked intentions.

Psychology helps us to uncover the truth hidden behind the smiles and sweet talk.

Identifying a not-so-good person isn’t always as simple as we might think. They often come dressed in the garb of a friend, making it difficult to see their true colors.

But psychology gives us tools to spot the signs. And boy, do I have some insightful pointers for you!

Here are 8 signs that someone might not be as good as they seem, according to psychology. And trust me, once you’re aware of these, you’ll see people in a whole new light.

1) They’re constantly negative

Let’s face it, we all have those downer days.

But when it comes to identifying a not-so-good person, psychology suggests we need to pay attention to those who are constantly enveloped in a cloud of negativity.

You know the type – they always see the glass as half empty, never half full. They focus on the problems, not the solutions. They revel in spreading doom and gloom instead of positivity and hope.

It’s a classic sign that someone might not be as good as they seem.

And it’s not just about being a downer. Consistent negativity can be an indicator of deeper issues such as narcissism, lack of empathy, or even a manipulative personality.

So keep an eye out for those who seem to be stuck in a perpetual state of pessimism. It might be more than just a bad day.

2) They’re always playing the victim

Oh boy, do I have a story about this one.

I had a friend – let’s call her Jane. Jane had a knack for turning any situation into a sob story. She was never at fault, always the innocent victim of life’s cruel twists.

She’d miss deadlines and blame her boss for giving her too much work. She’d forget birthdays and turn it around to how she’s too stressed to remember dates. Every conversation was a one-way street, leading to how the world was against her.

At first, I sympathized with Jane. But over time, psychology taught me better. This perpetual victimhood is a classic sign of an unhealthy personality.

It’s a manipulation tactic – by always being the ‘victim’, they evade responsibility and garner sympathy.

So watch out for the Janes in your life! They might not be as innocent as they portray themselves to be.

3) They show no empathy

Empathy – it’s what allows us to connect with others on a deep, emotional level. It’s the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. Pretty important stuff, right?

But here’s the thing: not everyone has it.

In fact, a lack of empathy is a common characteristic in many psychological disorders, including narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder.

When someone can’t put themselves in your shoes or seems indifferent to your emotions, it’s a red flag. They might not be as good a person as they initially appear.

So next time you’re pouring your heart out to someone and they seem disturbingly unfazed, remember: it could be a sign they’re lacking in the empathy department.

4) They’re overly critical

Nobody’s perfect. We all have our flaws, and that’s part of what makes us human.

But there’s a difference between constructive criticism and being overly critical.

Those who constantly find fault in others, who nitpick over the smallest things, who make a habit of highlighting others’ mistakes – these are the people you might want to be wary of.

Being overly critical can be a sign of an insecure personality, often projecting their own insecurities onto others. It’s a classic psychological defense mechanism and a sign that someone might not be the best person to have in your life.

So if you’re around someone who seems to thrive on pointing out your shortcomings, remember: it’s more about them than it is about you.

5) They’re consistently dishonest

Trust is the backbone of any relationship, whether it’s with a friend, family member, or partner.

But when someone consistently lies or hides the truth, it can shatter that trust in an instant. It’s like a punch to the gut, leaving you winded and questioning everything.

Dishonesty is more than just a bad habit. It can be a sign of a personality disorder or a deep-seated fear of rejection or abandonment.

It’s heartbreaking to realize that someone you care about has been dishonest with you. But remember, it’s a reflection of their character, not yours.

So if you’re dealing with someone who seems to have a flexible relationship with the truth, take it as a sign. They might not be as good a person as they want you to believe.

6) They don’t respect boundaries

Boundaries are important. They’re like invisible lines that help us maintain our individuality and personal space.

I learned this the hard way. There was a time when I let people walk all over me, ignoring my own needs and wants in the process. I thought I was being kind and accommodating, but I was actually allowing others to disrespect my boundaries.

When someone constantly oversteps, ignores, or belittles your boundaries, it’s a clear sign they don’t respect you or your personal space.

Not respecting boundaries can be a sign of a controlling personality or even a personality disorder.

So if you’re around people who seem to think your boundaries are merely suggestions, take it seriously. It’s a sign they might not be as good as they seem.

7) They’re always right

We’ve all met someone who thinks they’re always right. They’re the self-proclaimed experts on every topic, the ones who dismiss others’ opinions and refuse to admit when they’re wrong.

This stubborn insistence on being right all the time can be a sign of a deeper issue. It might indicate a lack of emotional intelligence or an inflated ego.

In extreme cases, it can even be a trait of a narcissistic personality disorder.

So if you find yourself dealing with a person who never seems to be wrong, take note. It could be a sign they’re not as good a person as they want you to believe.

After all, no one’s perfect – and anyone who thinks they are might be hiding something.

8) They take more than they give

A good person knows the importance of balance – of giving and taking in equal measure.

But someone who constantly takes – whether it’s your time, your energy, or your resources – without giving anything back, is showing a clear sign of selfish behavior.

This lack of reciprocity can be a sign of a manipulative or self-centered personality. It’s a clear indication that they value their own needs and wants above yours.

So if you find yourself constantly drained around someone, always giving but never receiving, it’s time to take a step back. Their actions are speaking louder than words, and what they’re saying might not be so good.

Final thoughts: The power of awareness

When it comes to human behavior, psychology offers us a window into understanding the nuances that often lie beneath the surface.

These 8 signs that someone might not be a good person are not just red flags to look out for in others, but indicators for self-reflection as well. After all, self-awareness is the first step towards personal growth.

It’s important to remember, however, that we’re all complex beings with our own unique blend of traits and tendencies. No one is purely ‘good’ or ‘bad’, but a mix of both.

But by being aware of these signs, we can make better decisions about who we let into our lives and how we interact with them.

And perhaps most importantly, it can help us strive to be better people ourselves.

In the words of the renowned psychologist Carl Jung, “Knowing your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darkness of other people.” So as we navigate our relationships and interactions, let’s keep this in mind – awareness is indeed power.