Spotting someone who’s not quite genuine is like a game of hide and seek – they may be good at concealing their true colors, but there are always signs that give them away.

The key lies in observing closely. When someone isn’t being authentic, their actions and words might not sync up.

An authentic person is comfortable in their own skin, honest about their feelings, and consistent in their behavior. But how can you tell when someone isn’t meeting these standards?

I’ll share with you eight signs that could indicate a person is not being authentic. This list will help you navigate through the masks people wear, helping you discover who’s really behind them.

1) Inconsistent behavior

One of the clearest indicators of a person not being authentic is inconsistency in their behavior.

Authentic individuals are true to themselves. They don’t change their stripes depending on who they’re talking to or what situation they’re in. You can expect them to act in line with their beliefs and values, regardless of the circumstances.

On the other hand, someone who’s not authentic might put on different ‘faces’ for different people or situations. They might be charming and agreeable one moment, then cold and dismissive the next. They may behave one way in private and another way in public.

Keep an eye out for these sudden shifts. They could be a sign that the person isn’t showing their true self. But remember, we all have off days, so don’t jump to conclusions based on one instance. Look for patterns over time – they are often a better indicator of a person’s authenticity or lack thereof.

2) They are always agreeing

We all want to be liked and accepted, but an authentic person knows it’s impossible to agree with everyone all the time.

I once had a friend who seemed to agree with everything I said. No matter what the topic was, she was always on my side. At first, it felt good to have someone who was always in agreement with me. But over time, it started to feel off.

One day, we were discussing a book we had both read. I shared my opinion on the book, pointing out parts that I didn’t like. To my surprise, she agreed with me, criticizing the same parts.

But here’s the thing – just a week ago, she had been praising those same parts when discussing the book with another friend who had liked them!

That’s when it clicked – she wasn’t agreeing because she genuinely shared my opinions. She was agreeing to make me like her more.

This constant agreement can be a sign of inauthenticity. Authentic people have their own opinions and aren’t afraid to share them, even if they might cause disagreement or conflict.

3) Overemphasis on image

When you think about peacocks, what comes to mind? Their vibrant, colourful feathers, right? Well, this display of grandeur is not just for show. In the animal kingdom, peacocks use their extravagant plumage to attract mates. The bigger and brighter the display, the more attractive they are to potential partners.

In much the same way, people who aren’t authentic often focus excessively on their external image. They may put a lot of effort into looking perfect, owning the latest gadgets, or being seen in the right places. It’s as if they’re trying to use their ‘plumage’ to impress others and validate their worth.

Authentic people, on the other hand, know that real worth comes from within. They don’t need to rely on external factors to feel good about themselves or to make others like them. They understand that who they are is more important than what they have.

4) They avoid difficult conversations

An authentic person isn’t afraid to have tough conversations. They’re willing to address issues head-on, express their feelings, and discuss disagreements. They understand that these conversations, while uncomfortable, are necessary for growth and conflict resolution.

In contrast, someone who’s not authentic might avoid these conversations. They may change the subject when things get tough or become defensive instead of addressing the issue. They might even resort to lying or making excuses to avoid dealing with the situation.

This evasion is often a way to protect themselves from criticism or conflict. But it’s also a sign that they’re not being honest about their feelings or willing to face the reality of a situation. It’s a clear indicator that they’re not being their authentic self.

5) They rarely show vulnerability

Being human means experiencing a full spectrum of emotions – joy, sadness, fear, anger, love. It’s part of what makes us unique, and it’s what connects us to each other.

However, someone who’s not authentic may shy away from showing their vulnerability. They might hide their true feelings or put on a brave face even when they’re hurting inside. They may think that showing any sign of weakness could make them appear less capable or likable.

On the contrary, showing vulnerability is a sign of courage and authenticity. It means being honest about our emotions and acknowledging that we’re not perfect. It’s about letting people see us as we truly are, not just how we want to be seen.

So if you notice that a person rarely shows vulnerability and always seems to have it all together, it could be a sign that they’re not being authentic. Remember, everyone has struggles and insecurities. It’s what makes us human. And it’s okay to show them.

6) They’re not present in the moment

Have you ever had a conversation with someone who seems to be there physically, but their mind is clearly somewhere else? Their eyes might be on their phone, or they’re looking around the room, or they’re just not fully engaged in the conversation.

I’ve been in situations where I’ve been talking to someone, pouring my heart out about something that’s been bothering me, only to realize they’re not really listening. Instead, they’re scrolling through their phone or thinking about something else. It’s a disheartening feeling.

Being present in the moment means giving your full attention to what’s happening right now. It means listening attentively when someone is speaking and showing genuine interest in what they have to say. When someone isn’t present in the moment, it could be a sign that they’re not being authentic with you. They might be hiding behind their distractions because they’re uncomfortable with being genuine and connecting on a deeper level.

7) They rarely take responsibility

Taking responsibility for one’s actions is a mark of an authentic person. They understand that they’re not perfect, that they make mistakes, and they’re willing to own up to them. They see these mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow.

On the contrary, someone who’s not authentic often plays the blame game. It’s always someone else’s fault, never theirs. They might blame their boss for their poor job performance, their partner for their unhappiness, or their friend for a failed project.

This unwillingness to take responsibility could be a sign of insecurity or fear of criticism. Instead of facing their mistakes and learning from them, they’d rather deflect blame to protect their ego.

So if you notice that someone is always pointing fingers and never accepting fault, it could be a sign that they’re not being authentic. An authentic person acknowledges their flaws and mistakes, learns from them, and strives to do better.

8) Their actions don’t match their words

At the end of the day, authenticity boils down to one fundamental principle – alignment between words and actions. Authentic people walk their talk. They live by their values and principles, and their actions reflect what they say.

If a person promises to do something but consistently fails to follow through, it could be a sign of inauthenticity. If they proclaim certain values but their actions contradict those values, it’s another red flag.

Remember, words are easy. Actions are harder, but they’re what truly reveal a person’s character. So always pay attention to whether a person’s actions match their words – it’s the most reliable indicator of their authenticity.

Final thoughts: Authenticity is a journey

Uncovering the genuine aspects of a person is a challenging endeavor. It requires observation, intuition, and a deep understanding of human behavior.

Authenticity is more than just being truthful; it’s about being true to oneself. It’s about aligning actions with words, expressing genuine emotions, and letting go of the need to please everyone.

As Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung once said, “The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” This journey towards authenticity is not a destination but a process, an ongoing exploration of self.

So as you navigate through your interactions with others, keep these eight signs in mind. But remember, each person’s journey towards authenticity is unique and complex.

Instead of using these signs as definitive proof of someone’s inauthibility, use them as tools to better understand the people around you. After all, understanding leads to empathy, and empathy leads to deeper, more authentic connections.

As you conclude reading this article, take a moment to reflect on your own journey towards authenticity. Are you showing up as your true self in your interactions with others? Are there areas in your life where you can be more authentic? Remember, authenticity starts from within.