There’s a fine line between sharing about oneself and making everything about oneself.

The line is all about intent. Self-centered individuals tend to steer conversations towards themselves, often oblivious to the interests of others.

Sharing, on the other hand, is a two-way street; you give and take, fostering a balanced conversation.

Self-centered people have a knack for twisting words to keep the spotlight firmly on them. And if you listen closely, you’ll notice certain phrases popping up quite often.

Here’s a look at eight phrases self-centered people commonly use to keep the conversation revolving around them.

1) I, me, mine

One of the most glaring signs of self-centered individuals is their excessive use of first-person pronouns – ‘I’, ‘me’, and ‘mine’.

These words dominate their conversations, subtly shifting the focus back to them, irrespective of the topic at hand.

Consider this. You’re discussing your recent vacation, and before you know it, they’ve hijacked the conversation to reminisce about their own travel experiences.

This seemingly innocent linguistic habit is a strategic move to keep themselves at the center of attention.

So whenever you hear an overdose of ‘I’, ‘me’, or ‘mine’ in a conversation, you’re likely dealing with a self-centered person.

It’s not about counting the number of first-person pronouns used. It’s more about the intent and pattern behind their usage.

2) Did I ever tell you about the time…?

Another phrase often used by self-centered individuals is “Did I ever tell you about the time…?”

This phrase is a clear indicator that the conversation is about to take a detour, veering off the main road of your shared discussion and straight into the territory of their personal experiences.

For instance, I remember catching up with an old friend – or rather, trying to. Every time I started sharing about my life, she would interrupt with, “Did I ever tell you about the time when…?” followed by a long story about herself.

It seemed like she was more interested in narrating her adventures than hearing about my life. The conversation was a one-way street, heading only in her direction.

3) You wouldn’t understand…

“You wouldn’t understand…” is a phrase often used by self-centered individuals to subtly undermine others while also drawing attention back to themselves.

This statement implies a certain uniqueness or complexity in their situation that others can’t comprehend. It’s another way of saying, “My experiences are more important or complex than yours.”

Psychological studies suggest that this kind of behavior may stem from a deep-seated need for validation or attention, often rooted in insecurity.

By stating that others wouldn’t understand, they’re essentially creating a barrier that sets them apart, making their experiences seem more significant and thereby placing themselves back at the center of the conversation.

4) I know, right?

“I know, right?” might seem like an innocuous phrase, a simple agreement with what someone else has said. But in the hands of a self-centered individual, it can serve as a tool to redirect the conversation back to them.

Instead of acknowledging the other person’s statement or feelings, they’re essentially saying, “Yes, I know. I’ve experienced it too. Let’s talk about that instead.”

This phrase takes the focus off the other person and their experiences and puts it back on the self-centered individual and their own experiences.

In essence, “I know, right?” becomes less about agreement and more about shifting the spotlight back to them.

5) You think that’s bad…

The phrase “You think that’s bad…” is a classic move by self-centered individuals. In their quest to keep the spotlight on themselves, they often minimize others’ problems or experiences by comparing them to their own.

Imagine you’re sharing a tough experience, looking for empathy or understanding. The self-centered person interrupts with “You think that’s bad…”, then proceeds to share something they believe is worse from their own life.

In doing so, they invalidate your feelings and experiences, subtly implying that their struggles are more significant. It’s a hurtful tactic that can make you feel unheard and undervalued, while once again placing them at the center of attention.

6) Actually…

“Actually…” is a phrase I’ve noticed often in conversations with self-centered people. It’s a term that might seem harmless but can be used as a tool to dominate conversations and make them all about themselves.

I used to have a colleague who had a habit of correcting or adding to what others said with “Actually…”. It was as if he felt the need to insert his perspective into every discussion, whether it was relevant or not.

His “Actually…” was often followed by an anecdote from his life, an opinion, or a so-called ‘fact’. Instead of contributing to the conversation, it felt like he was steering it back towards himself, making it about his knowledge or experiences.

Beware of the “Actually…” – it’s often a veiled attempt by self-centered individuals to keep the conversation revolving around them.

7) But enough about you…

“But enough about you…” is a phrase often used by self-centered individuals to abruptly change the subject back to themselves.

This phrase is usually followed by them launching into a monologue about their life, their achievements, or their problems. The conversation, which might have momentarily strayed away from them, is quickly redirected back to their favorite topic – themselves.

While it may seem comical in its transparency, it’s a clear sign of someone who struggles to maintain a balanced conversation and has a strong need to keep the focus on themselves.

8) Anyway…

“Anyway…” is perhaps one of the most telling phrases used by self-centered individuals. It’s a conversational pivot, a clear signal that they’re done listening and ready to start talking about themselves again.

This phrase is often used to dismiss what others are saying, cutting them off mid-conversation to redirect the focus back to themselves. It’s a blatant disregard for others’ thoughts, feelings, or experiences.

If “Anyway…” is a common phrase in your conversations with someone, it might be time to reassess the balance in that relationship.