7 types of childhood friends that aren’t worth keeping in touch with, according to psychology

Ava Sinclair by Ava Sinclair | December 6, 2024, 12:39 pm

Friendship is a choice, not an obligation. Growing up, we form bonds with people who may not necessarily be the best for us.

According to psychology, there are certain types of childhood friends that aren’t worth keeping in touch with as we grow older.

These are friendships that could potentially hold us back or negatively affect our mental health. It’s about understanding when certain friendships no longer serve us and having the courage to let them go.

In this article, I’ll share with you 7 types of childhood friends that, from a psychological perspective, you might be better off without. Let’s dive in.

1) The constant competitor

We’ve all had that one friend in our childhood who constantly turned everything into a competition.

From grades to sports, they were always on a mission to outdo you. While a little healthy competition is good, too much can affect your self-esteem and create unnecessary stress.

According to psychology, this type of friend could potentially harm your mental health in the long run. It’s not just about winning or losing, it’s about the constant need to prove yourself and never feeling good enough.

Competition should inspire growth, not create animosity or feelings of inadequacy.

If you find that your friendship is more of a rivalry, it might be time to reconsider its value in your life. Remember, friendships should lift you up, not drag you down.

2) The emotional vampire

I remember having a friend growing up who was a constant source of negativity. Let’s call him Jack.

Jack was the type of friend who would always bring you down instead of lifting you up. Every conversation was about his problems, his issues, his life – it was emotionally draining.

Psychologists refer to these types of friends as “emotional vampires.” They suck the positivity out of you and leave you feeling drained and exhausted.

One day, I realized that after every interaction with Jack, I felt more stressed and anxious. That’s when I knew I had to distance myself for the sake of my own mental health.

It’s important to surround yourself with people who contribute to your wellbeing, not those who consistently deplete it. If you identify an emotional vampire in your life, it might be time to rethink that relationship.

3) The fair-weather friend

You know those friends who are only around when things are going well? They’re the life of the party when you’re celebrating, but disappear when you’re going through a rough patch.

These types of friends are known as fair-weather friends.

They’re there for the good times, but are nowhere to be found when you need a shoulder to lean on.

Interestingly, a study found that the average person only has two close friends they can rely on in times of crisis. This highlights the importance of quality over quantity in friendships.

If you have a friend who only shows up for the fun times, it might be time to evaluate whether they’re truly a valuable part of your life. True friends are there for you through thick and thin.

4) The gossipmonger

We’ve all come across the type of friend who thrives on rumors and gossip. They always have the latest scoop and can’t wait to share it. While it might seem harmless at first, being friends with a habitual gossip can be damaging.

Psychology suggests that individuals who engage in constant gossip tend to have low self-esteem and confidence issues. They use gossip as a means to fit in or feel superior.

This type of behavior not only breeds negativity, but it also raises questions about trust. If they’re talking about others to you, what’s stopping them from talking about you to others?

A friendship built on trust and respect is far more rewarding than one based on whispers and rumors. Consider distancing yourself from the gossipmonger for healthier social interactions.

5) The unapologetic critic

Growing up, I had a friend named Lisa. She was smart, witty, and always had something to say about everything – including me. Her words often came off as harsh criticisms rather than constructive feedback.

The constant critique started affecting my self-confidence. I found myself second-guessing my decisions and feeling insecure about my abilities.

Psychologists suggest that friends who continuously criticize you without reason or empathy can contribute to low self-esteem. Constructive criticism is healthy, but when it becomes incessant and harsh, it’s no longer beneficial.

It’s crucial to surround yourself with friends who support and encourage you, not those who constantly find faults. Remember, a good friend helps you to become the best version of yourself.

6) The flaky friend

We all have that one friend who always cancels plans at the last minute, or worse, simply doesn’t show up. This type of friend is known as the flaky friend.

While we all have moments where we need to reschedule or cancel plans, a consistent pattern of this behavior can be frustrating and hurtful. It sends a message that your time isn’t valued.

Psychologists suggest that maintaining relationships with unreliable people can lead to feelings of frustration and resentment. It’s important to have friends who respect your time and commitments.

If a friend consistently fails to follow through on plans, it might be worth reconsidering the role they play in your life. Healthy friendships are built on mutual respect and reliability.

7) The guilt-tripper

The most detrimental type of friend to keep in your life is the guilt-tripper. This is the friend who consistently makes you feel guilty for not meeting their expectations or demands. They use guilt as a weapon to manipulate you into doing what they want.

Psychologists warn that this form of emotional manipulation can have severe impacts on your mental health, including increased stress and anxiety levels.

Remember, true friendship is about mutual respect and understanding, not manipulation. It’s critical to establish boundaries with such friends or consider letting go if the behavior persists. Your mental health should always be a priority.