7 signs you’re spending time with people who don’t really respect you, according to psychology

Isabella Chase by Isabella Chase | February 15, 2025, 8:32 am

Respect is the foundation of any healthy relationship—whether it’s with friends, family, or coworkers. But sometimes, we don’t realize we’re spending time with people who don’t truly respect us.

The tricky part is that disrespect isn’t always obvious. It can show up in subtle ways—interrupting, dismissing your feelings, or making you feel like your time doesn’t matter.

According to psychology, there are clear signs that someone doesn’t respect you. And once you recognize them, you can set better boundaries and surround yourself with people who truly value you.

Here are seven signs to watch out for.

1) They constantly interrupt you

Have you ever been in a conversation where you can barely finish a sentence before someone cuts you off? It’s frustrating—and a clear sign of disrespect.

Interrupting shows that the other person values their own thoughts more than yours. Instead of listening, they’re just waiting for their turn to speak.

According to psychology, active listening is a key component of respect. When someone truly values you, they’ll let you express yourself without rushing to take over the conversation.

If someone constantly interrupts you, it might be time to ask yourself if they really respect what you have to say.

2) They don’t respect your time

I used to have a friend who was always late. At first, I didn’t think much of it—everyone runs behind sometimes. But over time, I noticed a pattern.

No matter what we planned, she would show up 30 minutes (or more) late without any apology. Sometimes, she wouldn’t even show up at all and would just text me hours later with a weak excuse.

At first, I brushed it off, but then I realized something: if someone truly respects you, they respect your time too. Being consistently late or canceling at the last minute sends a message that your time—and by extension, you—aren’t that important to them.

Psychology tells us that mutual respect is key in any relationship. If someone regularly wastes your time and doesn’t seem to care, they might not value you as much as you deserve.

3) They dismiss your feelings

Have you ever shared something that upset you, only for the other person to brush it off with, “You’re overreacting,” or “It’s not a big deal”? That’s a form of emotional invalidation, and it’s a clear sign of disrespect.

When someone repeatedly downplays your emotions, they’re indirectly telling you that your feelings don’t matter. Over time, this can make you second-guess yourself and even suppress your emotions to avoid being dismissed.

Studies have shown that emotional validation strengthens relationships by fostering trust and connection. When someone truly respects you, they acknowledge your feelings—even if they don’t fully understand them.

4) They only reach out when they need something

Respect in any relationship should be mutual, not one-sided. But some people only seem to contact you when they need a favor, advice, or emotional support—never just to check in or spend time together.

This kind of behavior suggests that they see you as a resource rather than a valued person in their life. Friendships and relationships should be built on genuine connection, not just convenience.

Psychologists call this a transactional relationship—where one person gives while the other primarily takes. If someone only reaches out when it benefits them, it’s worth asking whether they truly respect and appreciate you.

5) They make jokes at your expense

Some people hide disrespect behind humor. They make sarcastic comments, tease you about things they know you’re insecure about, or embarrass you in front of others—all while saying, “Relax, I’m just joking.”

But jokes that consistently put you down aren’t really jokes. Over time, they can chip away at your confidence and make you feel small, even if you laugh along in the moment.

Respectful people don’t use humor as a way to undermine others. If someone truly values you, their jokes will make you feel included and appreciated—not humiliated.

6) They don’t listen when you talk

A conversation should be a two-way street, but some people treat it like a stage—only interested in speaking, not listening. You might notice that when you talk, they seem distracted, give one-word responses, or steer the conversation back to themselves.

Active listening is one of the clearest signs of respect. When someone genuinely values you, they’ll engage with what you’re saying, ask questions, and show that they care about your thoughts and experiences.

If someone consistently tunes you out or makes you feel like what you say doesn’t matter, it’s a sign they don’t truly respect you.

7) They don’t support you

Respect isn’t just about how someone treats you in the moment—it’s also about whether they show up for you when it matters. The people in your life should celebrate your wins, encourage your goals, and be there when you need them.

If someone constantly downplays your achievements, discourages your ambitions, or disappears when things get tough, they’re showing you exactly how much they respect you.