Let’s talk about self-respect. It’s something that’s easy to overlook, but it can have a big impact on how we act in our day-to-day lives. You might not realize it, but there are certain things you might be doing that suggest you’re not giving yourself the respect you deserve.

This isn’t about blaming or shaming. It’s about recognizing these behaviors and understanding what they say about your relationship with yourself.

In this article, I’m going to highlight 10 things you might be doing because you lack self-respect, without even realizing it. 

Let’s get started. 

1) You’re always saying “yes”

Ever find yourself constantly agreeing to things you don’t really want to do? This could be a sign that you’re struggling with self-respect.

Saying “yes” to everything isn’t about being generous or helpful. Instead, it’s often about the fear of displeasing others or the worry of being seen as uncooperative. This can stem from a lack of self-respect, as you prioritize others’ needs and opinions over your own.

It’s okay to say “no” sometimes. Respecting your own time and limits is a crucial part of self-respect. The next time you’re about to agree to something out of habit or fear, take a moment to consider if it’s what you really want. If it’s not, allow yourself the freedom to say “no” without guilt.

2) Neglecting your health

I’ll be honest, this one hit close to home for me.

For a long time, I was guilty of neglecting my health. I was always the last one to leave the office, and I’d often skip meals or eat junk food because I didn’t have the “time” to cook. My sleep schedule was all over the place, and exercise was nowhere on my radar.

Looking back, I realize this wasn’t about not having time – it was about not respecting myself enough to prioritize my health. I was so focused on work and pleasing others that I completely disregarded my body’s needs.

The thing is, neglecting your health isn’t just about physical consequences. It’s a signal to yourself that you don’t value your own wellbeing.

If you find yourself regularly skipping meals, sacrificing sleep, or ignoring your body’s need for movement, it’s time to ask yourself: are you lacking self-respect? It took me a while to understand this, but once I did, I started making changes. Trust me, it’s worth it.

3) Settling for less

Did you know that people who lack self-respect often settle for less in relationships, careers, and life in general?

This could be sticking with a job you hate because you don’t think you can do better, or staying in an unfulfilling relationship because you believe it’s all you deserve. It might even be as simple as always choosing the worst seat in the room because you don’t want to ‘impose’ on others.

This behavior is a classic sign of low self-respect. It’s a way of telling yourself that your needs, desires, and happiness are not important.

The truth is, you deserve as much as anyone else. Don’t let a lack of self-respect trick you into settling for less. Aim high and believe in your value, because you’re worth it.

4) Constantly seeking validation

Do you find yourself always looking for approval or affirmation from others? This could be a clear sign that you’re not respecting yourself enough.

If you’re constantly seeking validation, it can mean that you’re doubting your own worth and abilities. You might be relying on others to make you feel good about yourself, rather than finding that confidence within.

While it’s normal to want recognition or appreciate a compliment, it becomes a problem when your self-esteem solely depends on what other people think of you.

Your worth is not defined by others’ opinions. True self-respect comes from knowing and appreciating your own value, regardless of external validation. Self-affirmation is a powerful tool, use it!

5) Over-apologizing

Ever catch yourself saying “sorry” when you haven’t done anything wrong? This could be a sign that you’re lacking self-respect.

Over-apologizing can be a way of minimizing yourself and your feelings. It’s as if you’re saying, “I’m sorry for taking up space” or “I’m sorry for having an opinion”. This habit can undermine your self-respect, as it sends a message that you don’t value your own thoughts or presence.

When you’re about to say “sorry”, stop and consider whether you’ve actually done something wrong. If not, resist the urge to apologize. You have every right to voice your thoughts and occupy space without feeling guilty about it.

6) You ignore your own needs

This one is tough, but it’s important. If you’re constantly putting everyone else’s needs before your own, you might be lacking self-respect.

It’s wonderful to care for others. But when it comes at the cost of ignoring your own physical, emotional, or mental needs, it’s a clear sign that you’re not showing yourself the respect you deserve.

You matter. Your needs matter. And taking care of yourself is not selfish – it’s necessary. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Start giving yourself the same compassion and care you so readily give to others. It’s not just okay to prioritize your well-being – it’s essential.

7) You don’t set boundaries

I used to think that setting boundaries meant I was being unkind or unreasonable. I’d let people take up my time, encroach on my personal space, and overstep in ways that made me uncomfortable.

But over time, I realized that not setting boundaries was a sign of lacking self-respect. I was letting others disrespect me because I wasn’t respecting myself enough to draw the line.

Setting boundaries is about defining what’s acceptable to you and what’s not. It’s about preserving your mental and emotional health, and making sure others treat you with the respect you deserve. And it’s completely okay to do that.

8) You’re overly critical of yourself

Here’s something that might surprise you. Being excessively hard on yourself doesn’t make you a perfectionist – it might be a sign that you’re lacking self-respect.

Constant self-criticism can be damaging. It’s like having a voice in your head that’s always telling you that you’re not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough. This isn’t about striving for improvement; it’s about not valuing yourself.

Instead of being your own worst critic, try being your own best supporter. Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small. Acknowledge your efforts, even if they didn’t turn out perfectly.

You’re human and it’s okay to make mistakes. Don’t let self-criticism erode your self-respect. You deserve kindness, especially from yourself.

9) You compare yourself to others

Do you find yourself constantly comparing your life, achievements, or appearance to others? This can be a subtle sign of lacking self-respect.

When we constantly compare ourselves, we’re essentially valuing others’ lives over our own. We’re telling ourselves that we’re not good enough as we are, and that we need to be more like someone else to be worthy.

But the truth is, everyone’s journey is unique. Your worth isn’t tied to how you stack up against others. It’s about who you are as an individual.

When catch yourself in the comparison trap, take a step back and remind yourself of your own strengths and achievements. Self-respect comes from acknowledging and appreciating your own worth, not measuring it against someone else’s.

10) You don’t believe in your own worth

Here’s the crux of it all. If you don’t truly believe in your own worth, it’s a glaring sign of lacking self-respect.

You may have accomplished great things, received compliments or accolades, but if deep down, you don’t believe you’re worthy, it all falls flat.

Believing in your worth is not about arrogance or conceit. It’s about knowing that you are valuable and deserving, just as you are. It’s about respecting yourself enough to stand up for your rights, voice your opinions, and demand the respect you deserve from others.

Self-respect starts with self-belief. Believe in yourself. You are more than enough. You are worthy.