Meeting someone new can be nerve-wracking. We all want to make a solid first impression, but sometimes, despite our best intentions, we end up doing the opposite.

You see, there are certain behaviors that, whether we realize it or not, can instantly put people off. And unfortunately, these behaviors can overshadow our true personalities and intentions.

In this article, I’ll be highlighting the 10 behaviors that immediately turn people off when you first meet them. Better to be aware of them so you can avoid making these common faux pas. After all, nobody wants to start off on the wrong foot.

1) Dominating the conversation

We all enjoy a good chat, especially during our first meeting with someone. But there’s a thin line between having a lively discussion and hogging the spotlight.

You see, dominating the conversation is one behavior that can immediately turn people off. It sends a message that you’re more interested in hearing your own voice than getting to know them.

A conversation is a two-way street. It’s about give and take, listening and talking.

When you meet someone new, try to strike a balance between sharing about yourself and showing genuine interest in the other person. It’s not just about being polite – it’s about forming meaningful connections.

This way, you’ll leave a positive impression rather than driving people away.

After all, nobody likes feeling like they’re just an audience to someone else’s monologue.

2) Lack of eye contact

There’s an incident I remember quite vividly. I was introduced to someone at a friend’s party and as we started conversing, something felt off. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until I realized, this person hardly made any eye contact with me.

Eye contact is a significant part of human communication. It shows that you’re engaged and interested in what the other person is saying. However, when someone avoids making eye contact, it gives the impression that they are disinterested or distracted.

This encounter served as a reminder to me about the importance of maintaining eye contact during conversations. It’s a simple behavior, but it can make a world of difference in how others perceive us when we meet them for the first time. Don’t underestimate its power.

3) Being too negative

It’s human nature to be drawn towards positivity. In fact, research shows that our brains are wired to respond more strongly to positive stimuli. So, when someone is excessively negative during a first meeting, it can be a major turn-off.

Negativity can range from complaining about the weather to criticizing others or expressing pessimism about life in general. These behaviors can cast a gloomy shadow over the interaction and leave the other person feeling drained or uncomfortable.

Keep things light and positive when you first meet someone. It doesn’t mean you have to pretend everything is perfect, but focusing on the brighter side of things can make a big difference in how people perceive you.

4) Constantly checking your phone

We live in a digital age where our smartphones are almost an extension of ourselves. However, constantly checking your phone while interacting with someone can come off as disrespectful and disinterested.

When you’re meeting someone for the first time, your attention should be on them – not on your latest email, text, or social media update. It’s about showing respect for the other person’s time and demonstrating that you value their company.

When you’re in a conversation, try to keep your phone out of sight. It can wait. The person in front of you deserves your undivided attention.

5) Invading personal space

Personal space is a universally understood concept. While the amount of space considered “personal” may vary from culture to culture, respecting it is crucial when meeting someone new.

Crossing into someone’s personal space can make them feel uncomfortable or even threatened. It’s like an unwritten rule – you don’t get too close unless the other person signals it’s okay.

Maintain a respectful distance when interacting with others. This not only shows respect for their personal space but also makes the interaction more comfortable and pleasant for both of you.

6) Not showing empathy

We all crave connection and understanding from our fellow humans. That’s why when we meet someone new who doesn’t show empathy, it can be quite off-putting.

Empathy is about putting yourself in someone else’s shoes, understanding their feelings and perspectives. It’s about showing genuine concern and interest in others.

When we fail to show empathy, it can give the impression that we are self-centered or indifferent. Conversely, demonstrating empathy can create a bond of mutual respect and understanding.

Make an effort to show empathy when you meet new people. By doing so, you’re not just being polite – you’re connecting on a deeper level, which is what meaningful relationships are all about.

7) Being judgmental

I once met someone at a networking event who seemed to have an opinion about everything – from my choice of attire to my line of work. Within minutes, I felt judged and belittled.

Being judgmental when meeting someone for the first time can instantly create a barrier. It’s as if you’re saying, “I’ve already formed an opinion about you, and it’s not positive.” This can make the other person defensive and less willing to engage in a meaningful conversation.

It’s important to approach new people with an open mind, accepting them for who they are without passing judgment. This openness fosters trust and understanding, setting the stage for a positive relationship.

8) Trying too hard to impress

While it’s natural to want to put our best foot forward when meeting someone new, there’s a risk of crossing into the territory of trying too hard to impress. This can come off as insincere or even desperate.

Whether it’s name-dropping, boasting about achievements, or exaggerating stories, these behaviors can turn people off. It’s like you’re putting on a performance rather than being genuine.

The irony is that people are often more impressed by authenticity and humility than a list of accomplishments. So, be yourself when meeting someone for the first time. Authenticity is far more appealing than a carefully crafted facade.

9) Being overly familiar

While it’s great to be friendly and sociable, being overly familiar with someone you’ve just met can be off-putting. Using pet names, touching unnecessarily, or sharing too much personal information too soon can make the other person uncomfortable.

It’s important to remember that building rapport and familiarity takes time. Starting off with a respectful and professional demeanor allows the relationship to grow organically, at a pace that’s comfortable for both parties.

So, aim for a balance between being friendly and maintaining appropriate boundaries when meeting someone new. It’s about respecting the other person’s comfort zone.

10) Not being present

The greatest gift we can give someone is our full attention. When we’re not present in our interactions, it’s noticeable and often perceived as disinterest or disrespect.

Whether it’s zoning out, looking over their shoulder, or planning what to say next, these behaviors can instantly turn people off. They signal that you’re not fully engaged in the conversation or interested in the person you’re with.

Being present isn’t just about being physically there. It’s about being mentally and emotionally engaged, showing genuine interest in the person and the conversation. This is the key to creating authentic connections and leaving a positive impression when meeting someone new.

Final thoughts: It’s a matter of respect

At its core, making a positive impression when meeting someone new hinges on a fundamental principle: respect.

Respect for the other person’s time, space, thoughts, and feelings. It’s about showing genuine interest in them and valuing their presence in that moment.

Each of these behaviors – from dominating the conversation to not being fully present – are, in essence, breaches of this respect.

As American author and motivational speaker, Zig Ziglar, once said, “The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty.”

In the context of first impressions, these words ring true. Demonstrating respect and integrity can go a long way in establishing positive connections with others.

So next time you find yourself meeting someone new, take a moment to reflect on these behaviors. Remember the importance of respect and the impact it has on our interactions. After all, we’re all just people navigating our way through this shared journey we call life.